I am a terrible person because.... (2 Viewers)

[Sheik Yerbouti]

I'm not a terrible person. I'm a white knight!

 

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[Quetzalcoatl]

* brown

 

[WΏΏdy?]

Racist!

 

[NinjaPoggy]

I killed my neighbour's annoying dog

 

[Fint]

This always happens to me,

Someone dies in my village in Lebanon, we go there to pay our condolences and respect, I meet with my cousins or relatives and maaaan, we start laughing for no fucking reason. There's this silence, everyone's crying, we start staring at each-others, we remember something silly and lame and bloom my body starts shaking before I turn my head down and start laughing like an idiot.

I hate myself after-wards.

Reminds me of a skit by Tommie Tiernan (irish comic)

 

[Fint]

I killed my neighbour's annoying dog

Really?

When I was younger I fed my sisters gerbil to my snake cause she pissed me off, that was pretty evil.

 

[Bozi]

this thread has legs and trust em guys the worse they are the better and funnier it will be

i have these moments everyday

 

[swag]

@ Bozi and Salvo

Nice on, Kate.

I'll have to think of something to contribute. It will likely involve invalids, trannies, or both.

 

[Fint]

The question is swag, were these invalids trannies by choice or did you play a part in their transformation ?

 

[Martin]

Yeah, Greg, are you actually grooming them or what? What's the story?

 

[swag]

Just scan the Chicago Tribune for headlines in the next couple of days.

 

[Christina]

I am a terrible person because the other day at the grocery store one of the check out clerks, who is a dwarf, said "I can help you down here" and I laughed in her face.

I am a terrible person because I close the elevator door in the library whenever I see someone running. It amuses me.

 

[Fint]

I am a terrible person because I close the elevator door in the library whenever I see someone running. It amuses me.

I was in a lift recently and held the door open for someone (who was clearly in a rush) just as it was closing, he'd asked if I was going to the ground floor, which I had intended to do but pressed the wrong button and ended up going two floors up the way. As soon as the doors opened he sprinted out, not noticing that he was on the wrong floor. Having realised that I'd fucked up I tried to close the door as quickly as possible, only he figured out his mistake before I got the chance and came back into the lift, gave me the evil eyes and we then enjoyed what had to be the most tense elevator ride either of us had ever experienced.

From now on I ain't holding the elevator door for anyone, this be my lift.

 

[Klin]

I am a terrible person for lightning a cigarette next to someone who's coughing.

I am a terrible person because when someone asks me to give them the whereabouts of a certain place, I answer that I don't have any clue, even if I happen to live next to the said place.

I am a terrible person for acting sick when I'm not in the mood for sex.

 

[Lapa]

I'm not a terrible person. I'm a white knight!

 

[Christina]

I was in a lift recently and held the door open for someone (who was clearly in a rush) just as it was closing, he'd asked if I was going to the ground floor, which I had intended to do but pressed the wrong button and ended up going two floors up the way. As soon as the doors opened he sprinted out, not noticing that he was on the wrong floor. Having realised that I'd fucked up I tried to close the door as quickly as possible, only he figured out his mistake before I got the chance and came back into the lift, gave me the evil eyes and we then enjoyed what had to be the most tense elevator ride either of us had ever experienced.

From now on I ain't holding the elevator door for anyone, this be my lift.

Somewhat similiar to what happened a couple of months ago. Some person who didn't speak English was asking me if the subway went to a certain stop and I said yeah, and at the next stop they just sprinted out...though I'm pretty sure they needed to go a few stops after that one.

 

[Enron]

Whenever I would see this fat girl scorpion down the hill to the library (while at University) I would laugh hysterically and just point. She fell down in the this manner about four times in a term.

 

[Enron]

Also when my German friend and his Jewish girlfriend announced at a beach vacation trip that they were getting married, I began laughing hysterically. When pressed by the lady to share my thoughts. I replied "I can't, it's really bad". She said that I couldn't make her mad so I let her have it. "A german and a jew getting married, man that'll be a gas."

 

[Zé Tahir]

This always happens to me,

Someone dies in my village in Lebanon, we go there to pay our condolences and respect, I meet with my cousins or relatives and maaaan, we start laughing for no fucking reason. There's this silence, everyone's crying, we start staring at each-others, we remember something silly and lame and bloom my body starts shaking before I turn my head down and start laughing like an idiot.

I hate myself after-wards.

I'm guilty of this myself

 

[Kate]

Also when my German friend and his Jewish girlfriend announced at a beach vacation trip that they were getting married, I began laughing hysterically. When pressed by the lady to share my thoughts. I replied "I can't, it's really bad". She said that I couldn't make her mad so I let her have it. "A german and a jew getting married, man that'll be a gas."