Also this is one of the funniest things i've seen today
http://www.amazon.com/Holy-Bible-Ki...?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=0&filterBy=addOneStar
Love this one
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304 of 330 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars NOT FOR CHILDREN, July 15, 2011
By
Count Barnold Livingston - See all my reviews
This review is from: The Holy Bible: King James Version (Paperback)
This novel was a sort of dark read. From the first book, there are already gratuitous implications of incest, brain-bashing, and some other really messed up stuff (don't want to spoil it for those of you who love creepypasta like this novel). Throughout the first chapter of this novel (there are two very long chapters, each with several mock accounts by some very creative novelists) there are more and more references and even direct accounts of God destroying people for not worshipping him the right way. Oh, and NEVAR create a bronze, gold, or even Papier-mâché symbol of God, he does NOT like it. He gets all jealous because he has separation anxiety, and he gets violent really quickly. But we stick with him, because we know he'll change when he realizes we're not going anywhere. This novel was pretty exciting, approximately until the book of Psalms and the book of Proverbs.
Then the Bible started to lull. Honestly, it could've been cut off after the first four books; after that there's not really much suspense of whether the characters would survive or be totally annihilated by their creator and friend, the moody, adolescent God. After these there are some very depressing poems and some prose which is equally depressing. There is a VERY sensual book called Song of Solomon. The smut-peddling author is describing the minutiae of his lover's body (female, presumably; although possibly a man with Gynecomastia and a tight rear-end) and talking about secksing her up really good, and there's a massage to completion and it's very disturbing. Not an easy read: I felt like I was reading smut when I pulled it out in public (probably shouldn't have been touching myself, but come on: bible readers, back me up on this!). After that some pretty boring stuff happens, but it's just a prologue to the next section of the book, called the New Testament, sometimes the New Testament of Jesus Christ (the protagonist in this section).
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