king Ale

Senior Member
Oct 28, 2004
21,689
Adversity creates strength, comfort weakness, plus like i said the tendency in American Society to be overly nice is just not realistic it also creates phenomena like Tumblr trigger culture
Having enemies who dislike you and have low opinion of you (the way you define them) on a regular basis is not the type of adversity that creates strength without negative ramifications. I don't know about the tendency in the American society but even from a realistic standpoint, i can't really understand why anyone would consciously create enemies for themselves, i don't even know how that works.
 

GordoDeCentral

Diez
Moderator
Apr 14, 2005
70,977
Having enemies who dislike you and have low opinion of you (the way you define them) on a regular basis is not the type of adversity that creates strength without negative ramifications. I don't know about the tendency in the American society but even from a realistic standpoint, i can't really understand why anyone would consciously create enemies for themselves, i don't even know how that works.
It's like that part in fight Club when he asks them to start ranfom fights, i'm not saying it should be like that, starting fights for the sake of it, but rather flouting the convention of non confrontation, healthy doses of course
 

king Ale

Senior Member
Oct 28, 2004
21,689
It's like that part in fight Club when he asks them to start ranfom fights, i'm not saying it should be like that, starting fights for the sake of it, but rather flouting the convention of non confrontation, healthy doses of course
Now I know why i don't like that movie :p No but what if i tell you I experienced this shit way more frequently back in Iran because of the neighborhood my school was located in, and it never helped?
 

GordoDeCentral

Diez
Moderator
Apr 14, 2005
70,977
Now I know why i don't like that movie :p No but what if i tell you I experienced this shit way more frequently back in Iran because of the neighborhood my school was located in, and it never helped?
I'm not saying you should put yourself in a situation where you will sexually harassed, i'm saying you should get used to people being negative towards you and or will affect you less, it obviously sucks to be harassed, but it shouldn't stay with you the sole day is my point, and i believe that being more assertive in daily life you will get there, but that's just me lol
 

Ocelot

Midnight Marauder
Jul 13, 2013
18,943
You can change your story to change your emotions. But you can also change your behavior to change your emotions. You can jumpstart emotions, fake it ‘til you make it, behave differently, and people will respond differently.

If you play the calm one in a conflict, an opponent's response often makes it increasingly easy to continue to play the calm one.
Well yeah, but as with the situation king Ale describes there are situations where you know where the emotion is coming from, you know it's stupid, you try to fight it (by ahving a different mindset, doing stuff, distracting yourself, whatever) but the emotion still doesn't go away. You simply can't control them.
 

IliveForJuve

Burn this club
Jan 17, 2011
18,954
Well yeah, but as with the situation king Ale describes there are situations where you know where the emotion is coming from, you know it's stupid, you try to fight it (by ahving a different mindset, doing stuff, distracting yourself, whatever) but the emotion still doesn't go away. You simply can't control them.
I've had that but it was only during an authentic tragedy. Everything else is easily forgettable (at least for me).
 

Seven

In bocca al lupo, Fabio.
Jun 25, 2003
39,361
:p I have figured that you have some very broad "girls are this way" "girls are that way" brushes that are sometimes very inaccurate. I thought it was one of those :D
My broad ideas apply to men too. I choose to accept certain biological realities in men/women dynamics.

Which doesn't mean all men or women are the same btw.
 

IliveForJuve

Burn this club
Jan 17, 2011
18,954
I'm not saying you should put yourself in a situation where you will sexually harassed, i'm saying you should get used to people being negative towards you and or will affect you less, it obviously sucks to be harassed, but it shouldn't stay with you the sole day is my point, and i believe that being more assertive in daily life you will get there, but that's just me lol
An alpha male is never phased.

- - - Updated - - -

So, one of the biggest law firms in Bolivia (a direct competitor of the firm I work for) is involved in the Panama Papers. They have a shell company in Panama, and have helped several of their clients do the same or move their money to Panama (which a priori isn't illegal).

This is gonna be interesting.
 

swag

L'autista
Administrator
Sep 23, 2003
84,864
So for the first time in three years of living in the US, I experienced something I was used to back home: being addressed by a number of guys by vulgar sexual words. It hit me hard because it was 8 am in a familiar neighborhood on my way to school, and because i didn't expect it. There is a big difference between when you receive "flattering" sexual words, as unwelcome and sometimes painful as they are, and when those words are violent. To me, the difference doesn't come from the flattering-violent distinction though, it's just that i feel extremely diminished and low in the latter case. I was struggling with it back in Iran, that why do i let such a thing make me feel so down and defeated, and i never had an answer, and i still don't.
Bummer. Really sorry to hear that, Hoori.

I know this sounds cliche, but it probably was a lot more about them than about you. You just happened to stumble in the picture frame as the token object for a bunch of street monkeys to play out their chest-beating and shit-flinging dance to each other. A lot of times it's not about the "object" (not objectifying, but being grammatical here) but rather that's merely the catalyst for a group dynamic between cretins to express their own flawed sense of social order amongst each other.

Hell, there are political parties all over the world that have made mutual bonding experiences about shared abuse hurled at some random third party.

As in a woman who doesn't mind a good joke? :p I think sometimes we take life too seriously. Personally something like this would make me laugh because 1. It is unique. 2. I tend to have social anxiety so I am a little bit more difficult to talk to than the "regular" woman. My point is, sometimes icebreakers are nice. It does not always have to be so serious all the time. :)
I get that. But it sounds contrived to me and sort of reflects a guy who thinks he has to play some game to win your attention.

My kind of woman is typically straight-up and would see right through that and think, "Save the tricks for the carnival, dude." But everybody has different styles, choices, and needs of course.

Wedding season has kicked off again

useless people joining forces to form spare entities wasting my time and money

but i love my friends tho
Hallmark needs to put that sentiment on wedding cards. :touched:

This may be it, though. This could be "the year"

You may have to embrace the inevitability, Abel.
It figures that my father, a lifelong suffering Cubs fan of 85 years, would die during the off season just before they win the Series.
 

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