Utterly Bizzarre Moaning Presents............ (6 Viewers)

KB824

KB824

Senior Member
#44
Sep 16, 2003
31,789
#44
The Curse of Bill Cosby

Scene 4

Welcome to FC Bangawhore,located in Cuntilunia,they are the most famous "bi-curios,strap-on wielding,creampieiest" women's football club in the world. it is close season and the members of the clubs back room staff are working double time to ensure the squad is fit for the new season,while working diligently to strengthen the playing squad


We now find ourselves in the office of Andrew Beck, Chief of Finances, as he has called Symba, renowned black Italian porn star, and lastest signing, into his office to discuss her expense account

Andy "Symba, I'm glad you could come on me, I mean, to me to talk. Please straddle....I mean, please sit on my, no, wait...just have a seat"
Symba "is there something wrong?"
Andy- "no, no not at all. I ...well, we need to talk about these expenses you've incurred since you've signed with us"
Symba "Ok......... are you alright?"
Andy- "Yeah, its just a little hot in here. Mind if I take my shirt off?"
Symba " Sure"

Andy proceeds to take off his shirt, and reveals the largest set of pecs this side of East Drusanville

Symba "Jesus, your Pecs are huge!!! Oh my, oh my. Have you been working out?"
Andy "Can you keep a secret? I had implants. However, since our financial crisis, I couldn't afford to use the good stuff, so I had to resort to Jell-o Pudding"
Symba " Wow. Why is one white and one brown?"
Andy "Ran out of vanilla. Had to use chocolate for the other one"
Symba "Even still, you look so hot, may I touch them? Or am I not allowed, becaue after all, Black Italians don't exist, remember?"
Andy "Oh, I don't listen to all that nonsense. I'm very, VERY open minded when it comes to international relations"
Symba " Mmmmm...............Andy, you are so sexy, I HAVE to have you right here, right now!!!"

Our heroine proceeds to rip off Andy's pants, and suddenly steps back and unable to stop staring at Andy's groin area

Andy "What's wrong??"
Symba "Ummm...................do you still have any pudding left over?"
Andy "Oh, that's just wrong on so many levels. Get your ass over here"
Symba "Oh, God, Oh God..................................yes, yes , YES!!!"
Andy "That's right, baby. Say it. Say it."
Symba "Oh yes, yes, yes..............more, more"
Andy" SAY IT!!!"
Symba "Se Saltelli, Muore Balotelli!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Andy "That's right....................wait, what???"
Symba "What? What did you expect me to say??"
Andy " Get out!! Get out now!! I will not tolerate such intolerance!!"
Symba "Yeah, whatever, muthafucka. You SHOULD have used that pudding to implant your Penis!! I'm leaving..............................little dick white cracka mutha......"
Andy "I heard that!"

Just as Andy is ready to throw his clothes back on, Dusan enters the room

Dusan "Hey Andy, I'm noticing some discrep................what the???"
Andy " I'm sorry Dusan, I couldn't resist and.............."
Dusan "Nah, fuck that bitch, I'm talking about..............."
Andy "Well, I did fuck her, Dusan"
Dusan "No, goddamnit!! Your Pecs. They are.................they are beautiful. Absolutely perfect................May I touch them?"
Andy "Uhh, Noooo....... Dusan, step back. Dusan!!! Stop!!"
Dusan "Oh Andy............................."
Andy" STOP!!! STOP!!!!!!! DAMN YOU BILL COSBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

Meanwhile, back at the Virgin Ranch
Fred- "Oh, son of a bitch!!! I thought I shut off my webcam!!"
 
Martin

Martin

Senior Member
#49
Dec 31, 2000
56,913
#49
Hi!! I'm Italien said:
There. Better??


Good god, its a porn, for crying out loud.
Click to expand...
You mean you're not supposed to read it as a novel? *looks up from notes*

It looks what you meant to write was that Fred forgot to turn off his tv which was connected to a stream from the webcam in said office. Not that he had a webcam.
 
KB824

KB824

Senior Member
#50
Sep 16, 2003
31,789
#50
Martin said:
You mean you're not supposed to read it as a novel? *looks up from notes*

It looks what you meant to write was that Fred forgot to turn off his tv which was connected to a stream from the webcam in said office. Not that he had a webcam.
Click to expand...
Jesus fucking christ, can you do better in ten minutes? Instead, all you do is come in and critique one little line that I write.

What the fuck??
 
OP
Bozi

Bozi

The Bozman
Administrator
Thread Starter #59
Oct 18, 2005
22,747
  • Thread Starter
    • Thread Starter #59
    Hi!! I'm Italien said:
    I SO want to write a scene, just to see if I can even come close to this brilliance
    Click to expand...
    oh man,i love that idea

    Alen said:
    Remember the basics:

    - Sheik has a very small one, Osman has a giant one.
    - Fred has never seen one.
    Click to expand...
    :lol: tahts the basics right there


    Hi!! I'm Italien said:
    The Curse of Bill Cosby

    Scene 4

    Welcome to FC Bangawhore,located in Cuntilunia,they are the most famous "bi-curios,strap-on wielding,creampieiest" women's football club in the world. it is close season and the members of the clubs back room staff are working double time to ensure the squad is fit for the new season,while working diligently to strengthen the playing squad


    We now find ourselves in the office of Andrew Beck, Chief of Finances, as he has called Symba, renowned black Italian porn star, and lastest signing, into his office to discuss her expense account

    Andy "Symba, I'm glad you could come on me, I mean, to me to talk. Please straddle....I mean, please sit on my, no, wait...just have a seat"
    Symba "is there something wrong?"
    Andy- "no, no not at all. I ...well, we need to talk about these expenses you've incurred since you've signed with us"
    Symba "Ok......... are you alright?"
    Andy- "Yeah, its just a little hot in here. Mind if I take my shirt off?"
    Symba " Sure"

    Andy proceeds to take off his shirt, and reveals the largest set of pecs this side of East Drusanville

    Symba "Jesus, your Pecs are huge!!! Oh my, oh my. Have you been working out?"
    Andy "Can you keep a secret? I had implants. However, since our financial crisis, I couldn't afford to use the good stuff, so I had to resort to Jell-o Pudding"
    Symba " Wow. Why is one white and one brown?"
    Andy "Ran out of vanilla. Had to use chocolate for the other one"
    Symba "Even still, you look so hot, may I touch them? Or am I not allowed, becaue after all, Black Italians don't exist, remember?"
    Andy "Oh, I don't listen to all that nonsense. I'm very, VERY open minded when it comes to international relations"
    Symba " Mmmmm...............Andy, you are so sexy, I HAVE to have you right here, right now!!!"

    Our heroine proceeds to rip off Andy's pants, and suddenly steps back and unable to stop staring at Andy's groin area

    Andy "What's wrong??"
    Symba "Ummm...................do you still have any pudding left over?"
    Andy "Oh, that's just wrong on so many levels. Get your ass over here"
    Symba "Oh, God, Oh God..................................yes, yes , YES!!!"
    Andy "That's right, baby. Say it. Say it."
    Symba "Oh yes, yes, yes..............more, more"
    Andy" SAY IT!!!"
    Symba "Se Saltelli, Muore Balotelli!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
    Andy "That's right....................wait, what???"
    Symba "What? What did you expect me to say??"
    Andy " Get out!! Get out now!! I will not tolerate such intolerance!!"
    Symba "Yeah, whatever, muthafucka. You SHOULD have used that pudding to implant your Penis!! I'm leaving..............................little dick white cracka mutha......"
    Andy "I heard that!"

    Just as Andy is ready to throw his clothes back on, Dusan enters the room

    Dusan "Hey Andy, I'm noticing some discrep................what the???"
    Andy " I'm sorry Dusan, I couldn't resist and.............."
    Dusan "Nah, fuck that bitch, I'm talking about..............."
    Andy "Well, I did fuck her, Dusan"
    Dusan "No, goddamnit!! Your Pecs. They are.................they are beautiful. Absolutely perfect................May I touch them?"
    Andy "Uhh, Noooo....... Dusan, step back. Dusan!!! Stop!!"
    Dusan "Oh Andy............................."
    Andy" STOP!!! STOP!!!!!!! DAMN YOU BILL COSBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

    Meanwhile, back at the Virgin Ranch
    Fred- "Oh, son of a bitch!!! I thought I shut off my webcam!!"
    Click to expand...
    :lol:- i love it

    Martin said:
    Wait, what? How does Fred having his webcam on matter? There's no story about anyone watching it :confused2
    Click to expand...
    and here comes Signore Buzkill and his continuity issues,jesus Martin watching porn with you must be a nightmare
     
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