I agree, in some respects. I have not had enough experience with Italian yet to see whether they use it religiously or not, but I hear it a lot in French. "Il faut que tu sois content" for instance would sound really wrong if you wrote "il faut que tu seras content". But this might also be because I am more vigorously trained in French
With regard to the French not understanding, I think it's a combination of not wanting to understand and laziness. Especially in Paris. And even when you do speak it perfectly they still often don't want to talk to you. I haven't been to Italy in years, so I have no clue as to how they do it there. Do you think there is a similar problem there at all?