So, I need someone to explain something to me.
TikTok
I mean, wtf?
Look, I survived Vine and thought that was just a more amateur version of America's Funniest Home Videos, with the benefit of it being over in 6 seconds to limit the agony. Grandma fell down the stairs. Heeelarious. A dog licks its balls in a wedding. Hooheehaaa. I get it.
But TikTok? I mean, I've long heard all about their great AI selection algorithm and the "creator economy" bursting at the seams there. But as many times as I have tried hard to find anything redeemable on it, I just feel like Jamal on Slumdog Millionaire when he escapes through the gigantic sh*thole toilet. Everything is revolting and leaves me feeling covered in excrement.
There's the videos of people in showers showing off the different brands of shampoo they use. WTF is that??
There's the thirsty white whores shaking their C-grade strip club T&A for the camera in a dance to some vomit-worthy song.
The sassy black women who can't stop looking at themselves and pointing fingers at you.
The psychotic wannabe docu buffs who replay videos of historical human atrocities and disasters.
Weird false color images of girls making dumb faces covered in sparkles.
The occasional chicks walking around with filters of Japanese manga characters.
Jason Derulo attempting bad comedy.
Insanity is doing the same thing over again expecting a different results, but I've finally and really given this a try over the past month or so. And out of about 300 TikToks that I was compelled to click "Not Interested" -- as in, "please don't show this crap to me ever again" -- I maybe let 5 slide. It's that horrifyingly bad.
Dafuq am I missing, or is this really just it?