What Are You Doing Right Now? (131 Viewers)

[WΏΏdy?]

Dead tired, I thought things will improve once i move back to my hometown. They did in a way, eating on time and eating GOOD food, dont have to do any chores at all, the weather is the best in India, feel like a local celeb when i leave for work and everyone in the locality greets ya. Back with childhood friends breaking in our high school and college after midnight and get all nostalgic, spending time with my mom and niblings after a long time

Cons, I CANT DRINK! since i never go home drunk, or even smelling of alcohol, my mum would shoot me. From 2 packs a day i am down to 5 cigs a day! which means i am shitting solid iron bull horns most of the time in the toilet.
I still do go to pubs but can't drink, also can't bring a girl back home
My uncle wants me to join him everyday after work for hookah and listen to his stories about my great grandfathers coz according to him i need to learn my history and most of my aunts expect me to get married asap. My sisters think the only reason they dont like the girls i like is because i am doing it intentionally so i can avoid marrige and a few aunts that i never knew existed have a theory i have a wife in beijing or delhi.
And ohh, today i got back from work and was searching for my laptop to send some patient files to my boss and found my 8 year old nephew sitting with it in the corner of my room, as soon as i entered he freaked out but to give him credit he handled it well,acted all cool and closed everything down pretty fast. Being a guy and a little ass since childhood myself i immediately knew what he was upto I grabbed the laptop from him and searched the history of chrome he uses all the time, here is what he was searching....

I donno weather i should warn him about porn or being a real madrid/kaka fan

 

Buy on AliExpress.com

[Fr3sh]

What are you looking for?

Anything with a decent wage really.

@Woody

Everything is gonna work out fine akhee

 

[swag]

Breasts -> Spiderman -> breasts. Yep, that sounds like a young boy's thought pattern.

 

[WΏΏdy?]

Breasts -> Spiderman -> breasts. Yep, that sounds like a young boy's thought pattern.

At least he's still at second base

---------- Post added 01.05.2012 at 01:32 ----------

Anything with a decent wage really.

@Woody

Everything is gonna work out fine akhee

I need Kate or byrone to tell me what to do with the kid though

 

[Sheik Yerbouti]

That's fucking hilarious, Woody!

 

[swag]

At least he's still at second base

I think it's more than his spider sense that's tingling.

 

[Kate]

At least he's still at second base

---------- Post added 01.05.2012 at 01:32 ----------





I need Kate or byrone to tell me what to do with the kid though

Woody, that's hilarious. Don't do anything, just let him know that you know. Something like "So, did Kaka kiss his wife lately?" over dinner.

 

[ALC]

I wouldn't say anything. No need to embarrass the poor kid.

 

[Bezzy]

@woody

queensday was very perfect in Amsterdam

 

[IliveForJuve]

I will never smoke weed with my sister again, she's so fucking retarded! I almost got caught by my parents.

 

[ReBeL]

Making the last arrangements to fly to Turkey...

 

[ALC]

I will never smoke weed with my sister again, she's so fucking retarded! I almost got caught by my parents.

What she do?

 

[WΏΏdy?]

That's $#@!ing hilarious, Woody!

He's still at google images though, good thing i keep my mozilla password protected, if he got onto that the history saved in there would have blown his mind along with some other parts

I think it's more than his spider sense that's tingling.

Woody, that's hilarious. Don't do anything, just let him know that you know. Something like "So, did Kaka kiss his wife lately?" over dinner.

Nice! M gonna hide a camera and record his reaction to that, probably give him that 10 years from now in front of all his friends or his girl

I wouldn't say anything. No need to embarrass the poor kid.

I'd have to give him a reason as to why i wont allow him on to surf on the internet anymore

 

[IliveForJuve]

What she do?

My parents got home and we were just done smoking weed. She went to bed and my mother went to her room just to say goodnight, when my mom was giving her a kiss on the cheek she smelled smoke from her breath... And she asked my sister if she was smoking cigarettes, she said yes, and then she asked her if I smoked with her, she said yes (what a fucking cunt she was for saying that). She didn't need to tell her that! Why couldn't she blame herself alone? I got lucky my parents don't know what weed smells like but still... They are really disappointed now as they think I made her smoke.

 

[ALC]

My parents got home and we were just done smoking weed. She went to bed and my mother went to her room just to say goodnight, when my mom was giving her a kiss on the cheek she smelled smoke from her breath... And she asked my sister if she was smoking cigarettes, she said yes, and then she asked her if I smoked with her, she said yes (what a fucking cunt she was for saying that). She didn't need to tell her that! Why couldn't she blame herself alone? I got lucky my parents don't know what weed smells like but still... They are really disappointed now as they think I made her smoke.

Yeah, she probably panicked.

 

[Ford Prefect]

Shouldn't be allowed to talk to my girlfriend when i've been drinking. Some dude got murdered in her city and she's upset about it, I think i've upset her by my disinterest and lack of egotism.

 

[swag]

Woody, that's hilarious. Don't do anything, just let him know that you know. Something like "So, did Kaka kiss his wife lately?" over dinner.

^^^^ This.

Shouldn't be allowed to talk to my girlfriend when i've been drinking. Some dude got murdered in her city and she's upset about it, I think i've upset her by my disinterest and lack of egotism.

You need a breathalyzer app on your mobile. Blood alcohol > 0.08%, and all calls to your girlfriend are cut off.

Women don't like guys' nonchalant "Whaa? It happens all the time" responses.

Spoken by a repeat offender. (But not anymore.)

 

[Ford Prefect]

You need a breathalyzer app on your mobile. Blood alcohol > 0.08%, and all calls to your girlfriend are cut off.

Women don't like guys' nonchalant "Whaa? It happens all the time" responses.

Spoken by a repeat offender. (But not anymore.)

aye, but what else is there to say but "yep, he's probably going to kill you too"...anyone with a rational mind wouldn't feel threatened by another person being murdered unless they match the profile, are involved in the same crime or have upset someone....or live in a tyranical auto/theocracy / America.

 

[Noodle]

I wouldn't say anything. No need to embarrass the poor kid.

This this this. Seriously Woody, 8-year-old Raman can relate to that kid.

 

[swag]

aye, but what else is there to say but "yep, he's probably going to kill you too"...anyone with a rational mind wouldn't feel threatened by another person being murdered unless they match the profile, are involved in the same crime or have upset someone....or live in a tyranical auto/theocracy / America.

Emotional reactions unfortunately don't respond to logic, I'm afraid. You can tell them that the mainstream media reports on body counts all the time that have irrelevance to most people's lives other than to make them feel they are always at threat. But you'll lose that argument.

This is why smart people have it so hard to get elected in this country. You can't tell people how immigrants are the foundation of America when their lizard brains believe they are armed to the teeth and only here to kill white people.