* Customer: (rather irate) "Your install CDROM doesn't work!"
* Tech Support: "What error message are you receiving?"
* Customer: "It says, 'File not found'."
I verified that he is typing the correct command to run the install program. He is.
* Tech Support: "Double click on the 'My Computer' icon."
* Customer: "Ok, got it."
* Tech Support: "Now double click on your CDROM drive icon."
* Customer: "Ok. It says, 'File not found or device not ready'. Maybe I should just cancel my service since it's not working and go with another company!"
* Tech Support: "Sir...did you put the CDROM in the CDROM drive?"
* Customer: "Um, no. Do I have to do that?"
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A client phoned up complaining that her PC had frozen with the cursor in the middle of the screen. The keyboard seemed locked as well so we couldn't kill the offending application. So I told her to switch off her computer and turn it back on again. After about twenty seconds she said it came back on and it was still frozen. I asked if she switched it off properly or if she just switch off the monitor. And she assured me that it was the computer she switched off. We did this again, just to be sure, and this time it only took five seconds to turn back on, still frozen. So I knew she was hit the monitor button. I asked the question again, and she got a little uptight, saying there was only one button, and that's what she's pressed.
We discussed TV-like items on her desk, and I asked if there was something else on or around her desk. After the list of pens and pencils and other assorted desk supplies, she mentioned her "CD holder."
On a hunch I asked if this "CD holder" was two feet tall and beige. Sure enough it was. We switched it off and on, and it worked. She honestly thought the computer was just a place to keep her Windows CD.
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Gray, if you've got exams tomorrow, what the hell were you doing debating religion with me?
