The Secret Diary of Don Juan Capello [Collection] (30 Viewers)

[Bozi]

Episode 1.

in an upmarket suburb of madrid fabio capello is working on his evil plan to make real merdrid champions of europe once more. he has enlisted the help of tough sicillian Fabio C as his strong arm man, he is always accompanied by one of hs hoes, tonight cassano is the lucky boy

Fabby-"Canna, i am worried. our performances so far have been too entertaining. i cannot bear to see flair in my side."
Cassano-" i played well boss didn't i?"
Fabby-"shut it arse bandit, or would you prefer it if i wore teh strap-on tonight?"
Cassano-"sorry chief"
Fabio C-" chief we have a bigger problem, we have made a grave discovery. its those death threats you were getting...its not the crazed man from romania who calls himself "rab"...its worse than that"
Fabby-"what do you mean?"
Fabio C-"its from,,,him..."
Fabby-"you mean panucci?i thought he was dead at the bottom of the lake, i seen him go under"
Fabio C-"it seems he has been working in cahoots with zebina, two scorned lovers have teamed up with the intention of killing you"
Fabby-"do we know where they are?"
Fabio C-"latest news is theya re in marid"
Fabby-"ok double security, put tonino back on the leash, place emerson outside my door and for god's sake get beckham on the phone, if they get beyond security i may need to sacrifice a woman"

will the bitch squad get to don fabio? can fabio c protect his boss in the face of such ineptitude?will beckham ever discover what a hymen is? and what is zlatans shadow doing in teh background?
find out in the next instalment of teh diary of don fabio

 

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[Bozi]

Episode 2

in the heart of milan a late night phone call is taking place. zlatan is reaching out for his soul mate, who he feels abandoned him

Zlatan-"fabby, oh fabby i hate it here"
Fabby-"stay strong my cock jockey, you know i need you there just now. our time will come"
Zlatan-"yes so you keep telling me but i dont understand, why i need to bring down inters title aspirations. morrati keeps calling me to his office, oh god i cant stand the pummeling"
Fabby-"i need you to be my eyes and ears in italy, did you do what i asked you?"
Zlatan-"yes i told zebina and panucci that they were to meet you outside the bernabeu, can i ask why?"
Fabby-"Fabio C is gonna take care of them for good, then i can rest easy at night. when that is done i can take emmy off gaurd duty and place him on ring watch"
Zlatan-"please dont say that, why him?that was my job. oh fabby when are you gonna release me from this hell?"
Fabby-"just as soon as you do me one more thing"
Zlatan-"anything for you"
Fabby-"i need you to squeeze adriano's shlong when you are in teh shower together after training"
Zlatan-"WHAT??? oh please no it was bad enough when i had to take vieira's grande sausage"
Fabby-"yes but he will get mad and try to get you"
Zlatan-"no, iwont do it"
Fabby-" but then mancini will be forced to sell one of you to madrid and i can get the man i was trying to get all summer"
Zlatan-2oh fabby i hope you come get me soon,i miss you"
Fabby-"eh,yes ,you"

will fabby's cunning plan work?will zebina and panucci walk into the trap? will fabby ever change tactics?not likely. find out soon......

 

[Bozi]

Episode 3

fabby is unhappy...again. his old club is playing the sort fo football he forabade during his time at the club
Fabby-"what was that? flair,passion...commitment??i thought i knocked taht out of you"
del Piero-"i told you once i will tell you again, piss off"

Del Piero hangs up the phone...meanwhile outside the bernabeu a meting is taking place
Fabio C-"thank you for coming gaylords"
Zebina"but why are we here?are we getting to come to madrid?"
Fabio C-"well you are in luck, since cicinho is injured he needs cover at right back"
Panucci-"so...who gets to come?"
fabio C-"in my bag i have two outfits, one for each of you with instructions on the role that the don wants you to fill"
Panucci-"yeehaa he wants me to come in january i ahve a real madrid top"
Zebina-"sobn of a ..."
Panucci-"what is it?"
zebina-"its a gimp outfit, he wants me to go to london and sweeten up abrahmovic so eh can take over when jose steps down"
Panucci-" are you gonna do it?"
Zebina-"meh..its better than playing alongside boumsong"

are juve stuck with zebina forever? will zlatan finally find the balls to touch adriano's and fulfill don juan capello's plan? will lapo share his tranny's with the ex-coach? find out soon......

 

[Bozi]

Episode 4

having seen his evil plan work, ibra is currently out injured for 6 months with a foot up his ass courtesy of adriano. the don sets about faze 2 of his plan....

Fabby-"ok boys, we have been playing god football, passing the ball well, stretching teams to their limit. this..displeases me"
gasps from the squad as they hear this unbelievable revelation
Fabio C-"but chief what would you have us do?"
Fabby-"ok, here we are, the ball is in defense, with you,what do you do?"
Fabio C-"pass it into emersns feet?"
Emerson-"oh, i would like that"
Fabby-"NO NO NO,anyone else?"
R carlos-"shoot from the left back area?"
Fabby-"close"
Cassano-"feed me through where i can turn the defender, slip it wide to beckham who will lay the ball across to Ruud?"
faby-"you wont be on the pich my little arse-bandit. no fabio i want you to turn, hump the ball upfield into van nistelrooy who will then have to find a way to goal"
Fabio C-"but that is what cost us in the CL the last two years chief"
Fabby-"you questioning me?i can always phone zlatan, panucci,zebina and bring thuram from barca, they will do as i say"
raul-"the gay brigade"
Fabby-"right thats it you will be riding the pine for the next 5 weeks. now i am angry, you are all dismissed. except emo and cassano. my head is throbbing and so is my meat, better get some lube boys"

will Fabby's dastardly plan work?will van nistelrooy be chasing long balls all season?will zlatan ever release adriano's foot from his vice like anus? find out soon in the don's diary

 

[Bozi]

Episode 5

following a stressfull team meeting don fabio has blown off some steam and is relaxing in his bedroom

Fabby-"ahh that is better"
Cassano-"chief can i go now, i really think i should see the doctor about this rectal bleeding"
Fabby-"yes my little pole-polisher, i am done with you go now"

Fabby is startled as the phone rings
Caller-"be quiet and listen to me,they have been watching you"
Fabby-"if this is about savaging beckham with a strap-on i was simply showing him discipline"
Caller-"no it's not about that,it's.."
Fabby-"the stash of gay porn i left in my house in turin?"
Caller-"no, be quiet. your plan backfired, zlatan and adriano are eloping as we speak and zlatan has been talking"
Fabby-"what do we do?"
Caller-"sit tight, if they had anything on you they would have played on it"
Fabby-"who are you?"
caller-"call me deep throat"
fabby-"ohhh, i think i am gonna like you"
caller-"shut up,idiot"

who is the mysterious deep throat and who does he work for?will zlatans new found love be a rebound fling?and is tonino's bleeding a rectal tear or just a bad case of piles? all this and more in upcoming episodes

 

[Bozi]

Episode 6

despite Real pummeling kiev's defense harder than fabby pounded zlatan on their first date, the don has many things on his mind. he has lost both the newly married zlatan and adriano and henchman fabio c has just recieved disturbing news from tonino

Fabby-"oh fabio it is all going so wrong at the moment"
Fabio C-"what is the matter chief, didnt our display please you?or was it the piss balloon that caught you in the face?"
Fabby-"actually,no the ballon wasn't a problem, tell beckham he is on the bench next game. however i am worried. this deep throat says they know all about me, that they know all my shady dealings and know about my secret shame"
fabio C-"that moggi resorted to cheating because he thought you were gonna make an arse of the title charge?"
fabby-"no. any fool knows that, they know about my rectum wrecking ways"
fabio C-'while we are on this subject we better send a get well soon card to tonino"
fabby-"why?is it a bad case of piles?"
fabio C-"no, aparently he has suffered a prolapsed bowel due to repeated pounding"
Fabby-"ok send a get well card to my little fudge packer. now leave me alone, i need to think"

will fabby's secret shame come into the public domain?what are deep throats intentions? and who will bear the brunt of capello's raging man sword?all this and more in future instalments

 

[Bozi]

Episode 7

Ibra and Adriano are lamenting their teams loss and having their first marital fight when the phone rings

Zlatty-"hello, zlatty speaking"
Fabby-"zlatty baby are you ok?you sound upset"
Zlatty-"oh, its the emperor, he is saying i was a silly bitch last night for getting sent off"
fabby-"the emperor?you mean adriano?"
Zlatty-"yes he makes me call him that. i only went with him on the rebound fabby my love, i thought you had deserted me"
fabby-"no my ungainly spunk-bucket, i was working on a plan to get you here. you know that you are the only man for me, well and tonino,emo and the rest are poor substitutes to your mighty man-meat"
Zlatty-"oh baby i cant wait to hold you again"
Fabby-"listen i need to ask you something, have you been talking to anyone?"
Zlatty-"i talk to people all the time"
fabby-"no i mean...about what happened over the last 2 years. i have recieved a call from a mysterious man who claims that i am being watched"
Zlatty-"you mean deep throat?all i know is......"
suddenly the phone is ripped from zlatty and fabby hears slapping noises
Adriano-"give me the phone you little fairy, fabio if you call here again i am gonna shove my foot so far up your ass that you will be tasting laces for a month"
the phone slams down
fabby-"hello, hello...damn"

will fabby ever find out who the mysterious deep throat is?what is his level of involvment?is zlatan trapped in a loveless,violent marraige?when will lapo invite fabby to his next tranny party?stay glued for the next instalment

 

[Bozi]

Episode 8

in a dimly lit bistro in downtown madrid fabby has been summonsed to a private meeting, told to choose a booth near the rear he sits and waits.... suddenly his phone rings

Fabby-"hello"
Deep throat-"are you sure you were not followed?"
fabby-"positive, where are you?"
Deep throat-"turn around and look in the cubicle behind you"

fabby turns round and enters the cubicle behind him, there is no light and he cannot see the strangers face only the orange glow of a cigar

Deep throat-"the situation in italy has become unnaceptable. inter are trying to cover their asses by implicating everyone else. moratti has tapes on everyone"
Fabby-"so what does this have to do with me?"
Deep throat-"i have obtained transcripts of some of your....shall we say,dealings and i have to say i am sickened"
fabby-"so i like a little backdoor action, its not hurting anyone, my penis is only the size of a pinky"
Deep throat-" i think tonino would have something to say about that"
fabby-"leave my little ring wearer out of this, our love is pure"
deep throat-"luckily for you, zlatty has changed his story since he bacame a house wife and will cover your story. however you have a problem that i have a mutually beneficial solution to. robinho will be sold to juve in the summer"
fabby-"good riddance as well, he does ot want to play my special games so he does not play"
Deep throat-"so it is agreed, we may even be able to organise kovac coming to you to fill in defense"
fabby-"great he is just what i need to pass the ball to...... the..... forwardsssss"

fabby slumps forward onto the table, his drink drugged with a sedative. deep throat gets up and leaves. outside he enters a car and is driven off

deep throat-"it is done, he thinks we are helping him out"
driver-"then our plan is working well"
deep throat-"indeed it is, phone lapo and tell him i want a meeting. i dont care if he is with the ladyboys, we have work to do"

what is the mysterious deep throats plans? will robinho's resistance to capello's advances see him move on?will lapo find out the women have knobs, and if so will he care?more to come in the next instalment

 

[Bozi]

Episode 9

waking up in a seedy motel room with a sore head, fabby realises that deep throat drugged. what he sees next he cannot comprehend. before him in a pair of black leather lederhoesen's and with a rubber ball strapped in his mouth is none other than cunt face massimo moratti...
Fabby-"what the hell is going on?"
cuntface-"ppphh phh ohmemenebeg"
fabby-"wait i will untie you"
Cuntface-"what am i doing here?"
fabby-"how the hell should i know, i was in a madrid bistro then i was here"
Cuntface-"i was in a special meeting with mancini,then...nothing..."
fabby-"what i dont understand is why did they dress you that way?"
Cuntface-"eh..yes...they dressed me, aye thats less emarrasing"
fabby-"dont worry i know what you mean"

just then the door opens and in walks a large hooded figure
fabby-"zlatty is that you?
zlatty-"dont be mad baby, i needed to protect us both"
Cuntface-"you treaturous little jobby-jabber, dont forget who pays your wages"
Zlatty-"yes and you will tell manky-bastard to play me every week, no matter how rubbish i play"
fabby-"ahhh just like old times"
zlatty-"fabby baby, this guy, this..deep throat, he enlisted me but i dont yet know his identity. he promised he would help keep our love secret. now you have to go back to madrid"
Fabby-"what about cuntface here?"
Zlatty-"if he ever reveals what is going on, there will be pictures of him and adriano sharing a doube-ended dildo hitting the newsdeskc"
fabby-"excellent"
Zlatty-"goodbye my love, the man will contact you, explain the next phase of the plan"

what is deep throats aim?why is cunt face such a knob-end?is ruud van nistelrooy the missing son of shergar?more to be revealed...stay tuned

 

[Bozi]

Episode 10

back in madrid capello is taking advantage of the international break to spend some "quality time" with his young prodigy ctonino, who has not been called up for international action.

fabby-"ohhh baby, that is so good, remember slow and firm..."
Tonino-"why do i have to massage your feet chief?
Fabby-"well it was either you or Ruud and i aint letting that horse faced wankstain in my office"
Tonino-"uh.yeah,chief i need to play more. i am not even in the squad under the worst italian manager in living memory. if i got to play more then i am sure he would call me"
Fabby-"you make a good point my little chocolate-miner. you are an important part of my squad rotation policy"
Tonino-"yeah but so far the only rotation you have done with me was moving from my face to my ass"
Fabby-"just be glad i didnt move back again,it looked like i had dipped my bell-end into a jar of nutella"
Tonino-"but chief...."
Fabby-"silence boy, now pucker up and clean under my hood. when you are done send in ruud i wanna know if the face matches the knob"


will ruud be hung like a horse or just look like one? will tonino stay for the ass-action even though his career is going down the drain?will cunt-face moratti ever get those genital warts seen to?all this and more in future instalments

 

[Bozi]

Episode 11

ruud van shergarface has been found wandering around madrids training complex in a dazed and confused state.tonino has stumbled across him, rather than being concerned for his team-mate he tried to ask him questions. with no answers coming he runs to his love and asks him a few questions

Tonino-"fabby,oh fabby what happened to ruud?"
Fabby-"who?"
Tonino-"ruud,you know the centre forward you bought?"
Fabby-"no i dont have a clue who you are talking about"
Tonino-"you know, the dutchman"
Fabby-"no sorry you lost me"
Tonino-"scored a few goals for you"
Fabby-"if you dont start making sense i am gonna have to deep-cavity search you with my man-meat"
Tonino-"he looks like a horse"
Fabby-"ah him,i...eh...i made him wear a saddle and rode him around the office"
Tonino-"you what in the who now???"
Fabby-"but when i was fitting the bridle on...i found a wire,he is working for cuntface"
Tonino-"no way, how is this possible?"
Fabby-"i dont know my little prostate-prodder there are spies everywhere. i always find more clearly once i have emptied my load, drop your trousers and prepare for a rectal invasion"
Tonino-"wheeeeeeee"

who exactly are cuntface's spies?will cassano ask capello to cream on his face to ease his acne problem?will tonino be jealous when fabby's bitches come home from international duty?and is david beckham really a haemaphrodite? all this andf more in the next instalment

 

[Bozi]

Episode 12

the rebel alliance has siezed control of the pewok planet....wait wrong epilogue

cuntface has learned that deep throat is planning an attack on inters training complex,with the help of manky bastard mancini he has raced to the airport to stop deep throat boarding a plane that he believes is gonna smash into cuntfaces office

Cuntface-"stop that plane, the man is a a terrorist"
manky-bastard-"sorry what i was so lost in my own eyes in this fine morror"
Cuntface-"you really are a sphyncter stretcher,why the fuck do i employ you?
manky bastard-"eh...to win the coppa italia for you boss??

reaching the small piloted plane they manage to force their way into teh cockpit...

Cuntface-"the game is up deep throat, grab him manky"
manky bastard-"i'm too sexy for my...sorry what was that?"
Cuntface-"now all i have to do is take off this hat and reveal who deep throat is....."

pulling off the hat they are stunned to see a young man looking back at them

Cuntface-"who the hell are you?"
Pilot-"what is this??are you homeland security?you bastards chased me out of the states."
Cuntface-"no who the hell are you?
Pilot-"my name is tahir, god you guys are persistant. its really hard for an african-european-american-paki to get a job in america right now so i took this job for a mystery man to sign-write cuntface is a wankstain on the fabric of human society"
Cuntface-"what???"
manky bastard-" they got yo there boss"
Cuntface-"lets go idiot."

will cuntface ever find out who this mystery man out to get him is? will tahir ever convince anyone he isnt a terrorist after learning to fly? will ruud ever learn to communicate egain by stamping his hooves for sugar cubes? all this and more to come

 

[Bozi]

Episode 13

fabby is getting paranoid about the mystery man and has resorted to desperate measures in his bid to expose deep throat...he places a call he has always swore he would not do

Fabby-"you know that the lines are tapped so i will keep it short"
Caller-"ok fabby you old arse-splicer, what do you want?"
fabby-"you are the only person i can trust to be discreet, cuntface has things on me and this deep throat character is trying to force to do his dirty work"
caller-"i see and you need me to uproot this guy and get him off your back?"
Fabby-"yes and if need be......"
caller-"it will be taken care of,if the need arises. this deep throat sounds like he knows his stuff,perhaps i can use this yo my advantage"
Fabby-"no this must end now and you are th most powerfull person i know. i know you can fix this"
caler-"yes and where you are concerned you need all the help you can get"
fabby-"thank you moggi, i trust i will hear from you soon"

fabby puts down the phone
Fabby-"that call will solve all my problems"
cassano-"thats great news isnt it ruud?"
Van Nistelhorse-"CLUMP,CLUMP"
Cassano-"great he is learning"
Fabby-"give him a carrot tonino"

meanwhile in turin
Moggi-"that fool thinks i am gonna help him"
Deep thoat-"then the plan is coming together nicely"

what is deep thoats real intentions?are cassano and ruud gonna leave madrid to produce a mr.Ed musical?and is fabby counting the minutes till emerson is back from international duty and in his arms again? tune in next time to find out...

 

[Bozi]

Episode 14

drowning his sorrows in an upmarket madrid bar, tonino is approached by a slender, big breasted gorgeous woman

Tonino-"hi there,my god you are beautiful. what is your name?"
Lady-"my name is christina...you know i have been watching you from across the room. why do you look so sad?"
Tonino-"my lover fabby keeps using me and going away with other men. fabby knows that i am so hopeless that i will keep going back"
Christina-"then you need the love of a good woman to forget her"
Tonino-"eh...yes her...what did you have in mind?"
Christina-"how about we slip out and book a hotel room"
Tonino-"wow you move fast, you must be really wanting to sleep with the handsome tonino"
christina-"eh..yes...handsome,look i am just gonna have to go powder my nose"

she leaves the table and goes into the bathromm where she places a phonecall
Christina-"ook i have him now he is so desperate for love you could have used a blow-up doll and he would still have folowed his dick"
Deep throat-"you have done well, this operation will bring you close to fabby"
christina-"excellent, then it all depends on me getting tonino to believe i am interested in him seriously"
deep throat-"just grin and bear it,soon we will have you and fabby together again"
Christina-"he wont recognise me, no-one ever gets past my glorious rack"
deep throat-"go now do what you have to do and for gods sake remember to drug tonino, no-one should ever have to sleep with him that is too high a price to pay"
Christina-"dont worry that pug-faced little cum-choker wont get too near me"

will tonino find out he is being used or just be so hungry for love he will go with anyone?will christina get close enough to fabby to implement her plan? will david beckham ever get to use the strap-on that he gott for his birthday,or will vicky use her real penis instead? this and more still to come

 

[Bozi]

Episode 15

tonino is having showdown talks with fabby, he has fallen ib love and wants to marry his new love christina. knowing that he cant help but fall into fabby's eyes he enlists the help of the person with the bigest balls he knows....victoria beckham

tonino-"fabby,my boss,my dominator. i cannot see you any more...i am in love"
Fabby-"what??what did you say my little shitter-slammer this displeases me and i will gag you with my...."
victoria-"you will do nothing little man,dont make me crush you like a can between my mighty thighs"
david-"who in the what now?"
victoria-"here david play with this shiny glitter ball"
david-"wow its so sparkley"
victoria-"now listen to me fabby ballsack you are gonna leave this little rectal raider alone, he is going to marry this wonderful woman and there is nothing you can do about it"
fabby-"fine...he will never play for me again"
tonino-"fine i will go to napoli"
david-"vicky..i dropped my ball can i have another one?"

will tonino really sacrafice his career for the love of a woman?will david ever realise that ball is a christmas tree bauble?will bozi ever run oyut of new names for gays?stay tuned for more

 

[Bozi]

Episode 16

concerned with recent events fabby has panicked and called moggi to see if he found anything, moggi tells him to meet him in a downtown saua. they arrive and go straight to the steam room

Fabby-"have you uncovered any eveidence who this deep throat is?"
Moggi-"no but a plan has been set in motion"
fabby-"what...this is a terrible meeting place, my glasses are all misted up and i cant see a thing"
Moggi-"dont worry it is safe"
Fabby-"so what is your plan?"
Moggi-"i have planted a mole, cassano's fiance. i fear that tonino is working for deep throat and christina was sent in to check on him"
Fabby-"good god, is she reliable?"
Moggi-"she is the best, however she has to see you personally, she insists on this, aparantly she is in love with you"
Fabby-"so she will talk only to me?"
Moggi-"yes but you may have to...."
Fabby-"A WOMAN? no way man, the only maldini i have ever licked was cesare"
Moggi-"get it together you rear entrance raider, she may let you knock in her back door"
fabby-"interesting, ok i will do it but i wont like it"
Moggi-"go now and be discreet will you?tonino cant know we are watching him"

fabby leaves and a voice from the back of the room startles moggi

deep throat-"i hope you know what you are doing, this could al blow up if christina folds"
moggi-"christina will say nothing till the right moment, her love for fabby is strong"

will fabby do the dirty deed and take a woman in his arms/bed/arse? will he break young tonino's heart twice?will vicky take davids balls off the shelf long enough for him to impregnate her again?all this and more in future instalments

 

[Bozi]

Episode 17

in a penthouse suite in an upmarket madrid hotel fabby is facing his worst fears...sex...with a woman. determined to get to teh bottom of the deep throat mystery he has turned to the woman who has captured tonino's heart. if she is indeed a spy she will provide him with valuable information on his betrayer tonino

fabby-" so what can you tell me abou..."
christina-"easy there big boy, i want to take my time"
fabby-"for gods sake is it not bad enough that i am here with you?i would rather get this over and done with"
christina-"ok then my big poop-shoot-plunderer, take me up the back door and i will tell you everything i know"
fabby-"i am ahppy with that"

20 minutes later

fabby-"say i am the daddy"
christina-"for that you get nothing"
fabby-"oh come on your ass is like the channel tunnel"
christina-"aye i have seen more backdoor action than a boyband concert"
fabby-"i have paid my dues,what do you know?"
christina-"well i have heard him on the phone calling someone boss,he said that you are a bumbling idiot and that robinho wil get sold because he wont let you bum-ride him. he also fears that you will send him to napoli now that he loves me and not you"
fabby-"thats it?"
christina-"for now i will let you know.until next time lover boy"

will capello find out he is being taken for a ride? will tonino ever finish puberty? will manky bastard ever find his balls?more next time

 

[Bozi]

Episode 18

tonino is getting ready for the biggest day of his life when he will marry his beloved christina and wedding jitters are beginning to get the best of him

Tonino-"ruud, do you think i am making the right decision?
Ruud-"clump,clump"
Tonino-"aye i guess you are right, where else will i find a woman so feminine,so loyal, so well stacked and willing to love me?thanks ruud, so have you written your speach?"
Ruud-"clump,clump,clump"
Tonino-"you cant say that, jesus my family will eb so embarresed"
ruud-"clump-clump"
Tonino-"yeah i know it would be funny, will you change your speach for a sugar cube?"
Ruud-"clump"
Tonino-"cheers man here you go"

meanwhile fabby is drowning his sorrows at the fat comfy ass that got away

Fabby-"where did it all go wrong?i had it all,a winning football team,a squad full of the finest players, a strong defense and a centre forward with an ass like a scoolboys, now look at me....shaky defense,losing my little tonino and a case of genital warts that just wont go away"
Emerson-"sorry you have what in the what now?
fabby-"oops sorry forgot to tell you before i went deep seat diving. i got them from christina"
emerson-"dont you think tonino deserves to know who he is marrying?"
fabby-"but that would jeapordise moggi's plan"
emerson-"i dont trust moggi, come on lets stop a weddig"
fabby-"we wont have time,we might not make it"
emerson-"well only one way to find out...lets go...."

will fabby get to the church on time? will tonino marry a woman who is spying on him?will zlatan ever pull his thumb out of his arse long enough to justify the hype?probably not..... all this and more next

 

[Bozi]

Episode 19

racing to the curch fabby finds the ceremony underway,crucially he makes it there before the vows and composes himself for the crucial moment

priest-"if anyome here knows any reason why these two souls should not be wed, please speak now or..."
fabby-"stop the wedding"
gasps from the crowd
Fabby-"she slept with me, she does not love him, she is a spy for moggi"
Tonino-"you really are a complete aswipe, she used you to get information i dont believe a word you say"
Fabby-"ask her"
Tonino-"do you love me?"
christina-"who wouldnt love sucha fantastic man?"
Tonino-"handsome too eh?"
Christina-"emmm...yes...handsome"
Tonino-"proceed"
Priest-"ok so if anyone else has no objections"

suddenly a voice from teh back
Zebina-" I DO"
fabby-jonathan?"
zebina-" this woman is a fraud,she has wormed her way into tonino's heart to try and lure fabby"
Christina-"NNNNOOOOOOOOO dont tell them"
fabby-"tell them what?"
zebina-"she is not really a woman...she is really panucci"

massive gasps from the congregation as they organist starts to play the crying game

christina-"you bastard you ruined it, i was only one wek from getting the snip, its all wasted now. i thought maybe fabby would love me as a woman as he didnt love me as a man"
beckham-"wait..is she a dude?"
Tonino-you liar, you cheat, you bastard"
tonino jumps on ruud and rides off into the sunset
Beckham-"i wish someone had warned me vicky had balls before we married"

will tonino return to madrid?will capello now find panucci attractive? will vicky and christina give david some strong she-male action? all this and more to come

 

[Bozi]

Episode 20

Bouyed by the success of the panucci experiment deep throat is calling in the big hitters
deep throat-"has anyone heard from tonino and ruud yet?2
Alex-"he was seen somewhere outside paris, him and ruud were fighting over a carrot. ruud wanted to eat it, tonino wanted to shove it up his arse. i cant see them sticking together too long"
Deep throat-"excellent, now are the wheels in motion for the next phase?"
Alex-"aye, all we need is my doppelganger rab and lapo's vast array of ladyboy lovers and we are set"
Deep throat-"excellent,then lets set the wheels in motion"

meanwhile fabby is trying to explain to emerson how he was tricked

fabby-"i am sorry baby, you know you are the only man for me"
emerson-"aparantly not....god you know i hate panucci"
fabby-"aye but i thought he was a woman"
Emerson-"a woman??A WOMAN??that makes it better does it?"
fabby-"i should have known, only once in my life have a plumbed the depths of such a cavernous colon. when i needed no lube i should have guessed"
emerson-" i forgive you but i ams till mad "
fabby-"oh my special deep canyon explorer you are teh only man for me"
emerson-"hold me close fabby"

will fabby worm his way back into emersons affections?will tonino find his way back to madrid?will rab catch fabby in an all-tranny-sex-party?all this and more.....stay tuned