"The Arabic Juve Thread... Reloaded!!" (16 Viewers)
- Thread starter Asma
- Start date
HAHAHAHA you guys will not believe this unless you see it yourselves. We fucking win!!!..
Guess who is number #1
http://www.cracked.com/article/174_7-horrific-boogeymen-used-to-scare-kids-around-world/
Guess who is number #1
http://www.cracked.com/article/174_7-horrific-boogeymen-used-to-scare-kids-around-world/
posted in the funny thread yesterdayhttp://www.juventuz.com/forum/showpost.php?p=2737876&postcount=13479
اجرت المقدمة الامريكية اوبرا ونفري مع اول شخص مصري التقته في الشارع عشوائيا و كان هذا الشخص اسمه طه بيومي , و في ما يلي نص الحوار
Reporter:Hi
Egyptian: Wa 3alaykom el salam ya 2otta
Reporter
o u speak English
Egyptian:Berfect.
Reportero u mind if i interview you
Egyptian: No, I dont have a mind
Reporter: What's your name?
Egyptian: Taha
Reporter: Sex
Taha: love it
Reporter: Oh no, I meant male or female
Taha (yelling): what do u sink?
Reporter:It's just for the sake of the report.. never mind...male
Taha: yas male... And i can brove it any time u want
Reporter: No,thanks, I'll take u for ur word...so.. how do u find life here in egypt
Taha: Egybt.. very nice cantry ..nice wezar ..nice food ..byramidz
Reporter:Oh well..beside the weather and the pyramids..what else do u like in ur country
Taha: Byramids,nice wezar,nice food
Reporter:Ok..lets move on..what do u do
Taha: I am very well ,sank u
Reporter:No,I mean do u have a job
Taha(looking around him and whispering):Jobat?..no i dont have any (jobat)..lessa mastaba7nash..do u have (job) with u?..we can esmoke it in my car..dont warry about bolice
Reprter:Oh my god,DO YOU WORK?
Taha:Yas yas..Taxi drivar
Reporter:What do u think about the traffic problem in Egypt?
Taha:Very big broblem..very much cars..u see?..but za guvurment is trying to make it bettar..zey did the circle street and za me7war street..and zey make all streets one way so if u go..u cant come back..niahahaha3
Reporter:What about the economic problems in Egypt?
Taha:I do not undurstand what u say
Reporter:I mean..how do u deal with money problems in egypt?
Taha: No NO NO..egybt very rich cantry...we have alot of cotton..alot of water..and we have byramidz
Reporter: So do u make a lot of money
Taha:No no.. it is not legal to make money..one frend i know make money at home..and he go to brizon..if u make money at home..u can only give it to za banzeena "gas station" man..they take any money
Reporter: let me rephrase..since Egypt is a rich country.. do you have a lot of money?
Taha:me?! ..Not alot..but I eat and drink Al7amdulelah
Reporter:Then where does all the money go?
Taha: Guvurment
Reporter:And what does the government do with the money?
Taha:Zey Build circle street,me7war street and make all streets one way!
Reporter:well , Ok...Do u vote?
Taha:What duz zat mean?
Reportero u choose your president?
Taha:Mubarak
Reporter:yes
Taha(nervously): I didnt give my voice..but if I was.. I will give him my voice
Reporter:Why him?
Taha:Because he was an airoplane in za war..he waz za leadar airoplane
Reporter:But there are no wars right now
Taha:But if we have war..u see?...we know we will have a very good airoplane in it
Reporter:what about the last 30 years?
Taha:I got marry..and have 3ala2 and Amira..and drive taxi
Reporter:No, I meant what did Mubarak do for Egypt in the last 26 years?
Taha:He build circle street,me7war street and make all streets one way
Reporter:Thank you very much for your time Mr. Taha
Taha:No broblem,only 10 bounds
Reporter:I never said I will pay u for this
Taha: Ok..just give me the (job) then..we smoke ,and make head get high
Reporter:Grrrrrrrr
Tahak ok
Reporter:Hi
Egyptian: Wa 3alaykom el salam ya 2otta
Reporter
o u speak EnglishEgyptian:Berfect.
Reporter
o u mind if i interview youEgyptian: No, I dont have a mind
Reporter: What's your name?
Egyptian: Taha
Reporter: Sex
Taha: love it
Reporter: Oh no, I meant male or female
Taha (yelling): what do u sink?
Reporter:It's just for the sake of the report.. never mind...male
Taha: yas male... And i can brove it any time u want
Reporter: No,thanks, I'll take u for ur word...so.. how do u find life here in egypt
Taha: Egybt.. very nice cantry ..nice wezar ..nice food ..byramidz
Reporter:Oh well..beside the weather and the pyramids..what else do u like in ur country
Taha: Byramids,nice wezar,nice food
Reporter:Ok..lets move on..what do u do
Taha: I am very well ,sank u
Reporter:No,I mean do u have a job
Taha(looking around him and whispering):Jobat?..no i dont have any (jobat)..lessa mastaba7nash..do u have (job) with u?..we can esmoke it in my car..dont warry about bolice
Reprter:Oh my god,DO YOU WORK?
Taha:Yas yas..Taxi drivar
Reporter:What do u think about the traffic problem in Egypt?
Taha:Very big broblem..very much cars..u see?..but za guvurment is trying to make it bettar..zey did the circle street and za me7war street..and zey make all streets one way so if u go..u cant come back..niahahaha3
Reporter:What about the economic problems in Egypt?
Taha:I do not undurstand what u say
Reporter:I mean..how do u deal with money problems in egypt?
Taha: No NO NO..egybt very rich cantry...we have alot of cotton..alot of water..and we have byramidz
Reporter: So do u make a lot of money
Taha:No no.. it is not legal to make money..one frend i know make money at home..and he go to brizon..if u make money at home..u can only give it to za banzeena "gas station" man..they take any money
Reporter: let me rephrase..since Egypt is a rich country.. do you have a lot of money?
Taha:me?! ..Not alot..but I eat and drink Al7amdulelah
Reporter:Then where does all the money go?
Taha: Guvurment
Reporter:And what does the government do with the money?
Taha:Zey Build circle street,me7war street and make all streets one way!
Reporter:well , Ok...Do u vote?
Taha:What duz zat mean?
Reporter
o u choose your president?Taha:Mubarak
Reporter:yes
Taha(nervously): I didnt give my voice..but if I was.. I will give him my voice
Reporter:Why him?
Taha:Because he was an airoplane in za war..he waz za leadar airoplane
Reporter:But there are no wars right now
Taha:But if we have war..u see?...we know we will have a very good airoplane in it
Reporter:what about the last 30 years?
Taha:I got marry..and have 3ala2 and Amira..and drive taxi
Reporter:No, I meant what did Mubarak do for Egypt in the last 26 years?
Taha:He build circle street,me7war street and make all streets one way
Reporter:Thank you very much for your time Mr. Taha
Taha:No broblem,only 10 bounds
Reporter:I never said I will pay u for this
Taha: Ok..just give me the (job) then..we smoke ,and make head get high
Reporter:Grrrrrrrr
Taha
k ok
صحفي بيسأل لبنانية"
شو الفرق بين المسدس والعضو الذكري .. ؟
قالتله: تنينهم بيطخو.. بس الأول بيأخد الروح
.والتاني بيرد الروح
شو الفرق بين المسدس والعضو الذكري .. ؟
قالتله: تنينهم بيطخو.. بس الأول بيأخد الروح
.والتاني بيرد الروح
مغربيه تقول لأمها
باركيلي بتزوج خليجي
الأم خافت وقالت يا بنتي انتبهي ترى الخليجيين يحبوا الشغل من الفتحة الثانية
إياك يقولك إقلبي الصوب الثاني وتسمعي كلامه
تزوجت البنت وبعد كم سنة زوجها سألها
حبيبتي شو رايك تقلبي الصوب الثاني ونجرب شئ جديد
زوجته ارتعبت وتذكرت كلام أمها ورفضت بشدة
رد عليها زوجها
بس يا حبيبتي اذا ظلينا على هالحال ما راح نجيب أولاد أبدآ
باركيلي بتزوج خليجي
الأم خافت وقالت يا بنتي انتبهي ترى الخليجيين يحبوا الشغل من الفتحة الثانية
إياك يقولك إقلبي الصوب الثاني وتسمعي كلامه
تزوجت البنت وبعد كم سنة زوجها سألها
حبيبتي شو رايك تقلبي الصوب الثاني ونجرب شئ جديد
زوجته ارتعبت وتذكرت كلام أمها ورفضت بشدة
رد عليها زوجها
بس يا حبيبتي اذا ظلينا على هالحال ما راح نجيب أولاد أبدآ
جميله ردت بعد الدراسه بأمريكا
سألها أبوها شلونج جميله
ردت إسمي بأمريكا صار جم
لأنهم ينادون بس أول حرفين
قال
الحمدلله أختج زبيده ماراحت
سألها أبوها شلونج جميله
ردت إسمي بأمريكا صار جم
لأنهم ينادون بس أول حرفين
قال
الحمدلله أختج زبيده ماراحت
عجوز متهمينها بجريمة قتل
قالت : أنا بريئة والله صدقوني
قال القاضي : بس كل الأوصاف منطبقة عليك (بنت جميلة ورشيقة وجذابة
إستحت العجوز وقالت : بس ماكان قصدي أقتله
قالت : أنا بريئة والله صدقوني
قال القاضي : بس كل الأوصاف منطبقة عليك (بنت جميلة ورشيقة وجذابة
إستحت العجوز وقالت : بس ماكان قصدي أقتله