++ [ originally posted by Padovano
] ++
My team of linguists (three chimpanzees with typrwriters) have been analyzing the posts in this forum to determine who some you posters really are. Here are a few of the results:
1. Kaiser Libero: A semi-hot Belgian girl. University educated. Frustrated by the fact that her panties keep disappearing from the dryer at the local laundromat. Keeps a hardbound edition of Elizabeth Barrett Browning's works in her coat pocket. Will one day shoot and kill Julien Lennon.
2. Andy: A rich, white, suburban kid with a taste for hip-hop. Reached puberity at age 19 and was late in finding his rebellious years. Hates the wealthy white parents who ignore his existence, so he likes hockey just to be different. Disgraced his family by bringing Burke into their house.
3. Burke: A poor black kid raised on the wrong side of the Ohio River. Has not seen his real parents in years and lives under the porch of Andy's house. One day, after being called a "wigga" he will stick a knife in Andy's throat and run off. A fine thank you for taking in this troubled youth.
4. Blandest Claire: A Scottish boy who left school at 12 years old and moved south to the big city. Though still a virgin, he does enjoy performing orally on older women, usually friends of his mother. Once had a homosexual encounter with a roadie from the band Hole.
5. Incubo Nick: Is actually Napoleon Bonaparte, broadcasting live on his Mac Notebook from the Isle of Elba. His supply of Prozac ran out months ago, but his talking parot keeps telling him that he is fine, and it's the rest of the world that is crazy.
Well, there is 5 minutes of your lives you will never get back
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