this thread has became boring in last 24hrs, come on serge, pado, nick, vin. do something special.
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Nick Against the World (41 Viewers)
- Thread starter IncuboRossonero
- Start date
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Life Explained:
On the first day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years Let me have twenty years and I'll give back the other forty."
And God agreed.
On the second day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give back the other ten."
So God agreed (sigh).
On the third day God created the monkey. God said, entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty year life span."
Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, ok.
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you twenty years."
Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way man. Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty cow gave back, and the ten dog gave back and the ten monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."
So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy, and do nothing;
for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family;
for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren;
and for the last ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.
Life has now been explained...
On the first day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years Let me have twenty years and I'll give back the other forty."
And God agreed.
On the second day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give back the other ten."
So God agreed (sigh).
On the third day God created the monkey. God said, entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty year life span."
Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, ok.
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you twenty years."
Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way man. Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty cow gave back, and the ten dog gave back and the ten monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."
So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy, and do nothing;
for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family;
for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren;
and for the last ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.
Life has now been explained...
Now, I know some of you here don't like baseball.
Well, Too Bad. I'm posting this anyway.
congratulations to my man Barry Bonds for hiting his 700th career home run last night. Only the 3rd player in major league history to do this. Truly, the greatest player of our generation, and in my opinion, the greatest baseball player of all time.
Well, Too Bad. I'm posting this anyway.
congratulations to my man Barry Bonds for hiting his 700th career home run last night. Only the 3rd player in major league history to do this. Truly, the greatest player of our generation, and in my opinion, the greatest baseball player of all time.
Ruth- couldn't play defense, couldn't steal bases. Also had much better players around him such as Lou gehrig portecting him in the lineup
Williams- If he ever had decided to hit the ball to the opposite field, he would have gbeen the greatest of all time. Might be the best HITTER of all time, but is nowhere near Bonds' league in defense and base-stealing.
Rose- You're kidding.
Mays- the 2nd best player of all time. However, his skills greatly eroded in a very short period of time.
Look at Bonds' numbers in the last 4 years. The most dominant years of any ballplayer in one time span of any ballplayer ever. Most walks ever. Most intentional walks ever. the only member of the 500 home run, 500 stolen base club. 7 time gold glove winner. 6 time MVP. At the age of 40, he is batting .373 with 43 home runs, 95 RBI, an on base percentage of over .600, a slugging percentage of over .800, and the players batting around him are A.J. Pierzynski, and J.T. Snow.
Look at these career numbers. Look a this numbers the last 4 years. They are getting better as he is getting older.
Again, in my opinion, the greatest ballplayer of all time.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/stats?statsId=3918
Williams- If he ever had decided to hit the ball to the opposite field, he would have gbeen the greatest of all time. Might be the best HITTER of all time, but is nowhere near Bonds' league in defense and base-stealing.
Rose- You're kidding.
Mays- the 2nd best player of all time. However, his skills greatly eroded in a very short period of time.
Look at Bonds' numbers in the last 4 years. The most dominant years of any ballplayer in one time span of any ballplayer ever. Most walks ever. Most intentional walks ever. the only member of the 500 home run, 500 stolen base club. 7 time gold glove winner. 6 time MVP. At the age of 40, he is batting .373 with 43 home runs, 95 RBI, an on base percentage of over .600, a slugging percentage of over .800, and the players batting around him are A.J. Pierzynski, and J.T. Snow.
Look at these career numbers. Look a this numbers the last 4 years. They are getting better as he is getting older.
Again, in my opinion, the greatest ballplayer of all time.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/stats?statsId=3918