Quotes of the Week:
“There are rumours I’ll be fired? I’m used to those by now.”
Daniele Arrigoni develops a laissez-faire attitude to the chop after Livorno sack him for the second time this season.
“I was, am and always will be disliked.”
Marco Materazzi accepts his fate as the Panto villain of football.
“I too heard that our Scudetto was made of cardboard, but now that we are about to win, it shines like gold.”
Materazzi bites into the title shield and discovers it’s foil-wrapped chocolate.:sick:
“To receive my first Italy call at the age of 32 is marvellous, but I still feel as if I’m 20.”
Max Tonetto gets down wiv da kids.
“All week there was talk of my possible Azzurri call. Fortunately it happened, otherwise my teammates would have made fun of me for years!”
Tonetto risked being inundated with postcards from Coverciano stating 'Wish you were here!’
“We are in super pole position for Ronaldinho.”
Milan transfer guru Adriano Galliani lets slip the latest changes to make Formula 1 more exciting, along with the ultra chequered flag and stupendously yellow flags.
“I would like to be Milan’s Sir Alex Ferguson.”
Carlo Ancelotti takes Scottish lessons and buys red face-paint.
“I know Clarence Seedorf’s feelings on the matter because there is free speech at Milan and we have often discussed it.”
Ancelotti calls off Amnesty International.
“Both Ukraine and Poland have done a great deal. They would deserve to host the European Championships.”
FIFA President Sepp Blatter puts his vote for the Euro 2012 games firmly on the joint bid on his visit to Kiev.
“That’s Blatter for you. If he visited Rome, I can assure you he’d say Italy should get the tournament.”
CONI chief Gianni Petrucci can be so cynical…
“As a kid I had a poster of Alessandro Del Piero on my wall, so now it’s a dream come true to play alongside him.”
Raffaele Palladino still hasn’t given up hope of meeting his other poster model – Claudia Schiffer.
“There will be 60,000 spectators, so it’s going to be the biggest crowd the Under-21 side has ever played for.”
Pierluigi Casiraghi knows Wembley is a far cry from their last match at the Stadio Luigi Razza in Vibo Valentia – attendance 2,728.
“When they told me the number of tickets that had been sold for an international Under-21 friendly, I got goosebumps.”
Medical staff prepare smelling salts for when Azzurrini starlet Graziano Pellè steps on to the pitch.
“At last, after so many beautiful goals I was glad to celebrate an ugly one!”
Fabio Quagliarella must really envy David 'tap-in’ Trezeguet…
“In my hometown of Naples, people went to my mother and told her that her son was a druggie. Those were terrible times.”Marco Borriello’s Mamma can now go back to people saying 'Your son is a rubbish player.’
“The club excluded me from the Champions League list. Now I hope the Coach will use a little common sense, perhaps giving me a few more chances to play in Serie A.”
Borriello tells Carlo Ancelotti: It’s Ronaldo or me!
“In the first half the only difference between the teams was the fact that Lazio scored and we didn’t.”
Empoli boss Gigi Cagni insists quibbling over goals is a minor detail.
“This was an ugly debacle.”
Alberto Cavasin finds a classier soundbite for 'It was a bad day at the office.’
“I am moderately satisfied.”
Torino won 3-0 away to a direct rival for the relegation battle. If they win the Scudetto, Gianni De Biasi may break out into a smile.
“We are so far down that I have asked not to see the table yet.”
Claudio Ranieri goes for the ostrich approach to Parma’s troubles.
“We do not want to get relegated.”
Ranieri assures his players do not need to talk to The Samaritans…
“We know that to avoid the drop we must perform an extraordinary feat. We are in very choppy waters, so the expectation of victory and therefore pressure is on those who need to beat us.”
…despite such confidence-building pre-match talks.
“Giulio Falcone’s dismissal was the right decision. When a referee does his job well, you should point it out.”
After spending much of his career moaning about the officials, Walter Novellino gives what could be construed as a back-handed compliment.
“At Chelsea, everyone's 'geezer'. 'All right, geezer?’, 'Morning, geezer.’ Some of the foreign boys come in like Sheva, who can hardly speak a word of English, and within a couple of weeks, all he can say is 'Alright, geezer!’”
Frank Lampard reveals moving to Chelsea to improve his English may have backfired on Andriy 'Nouveau Mockney’ Shevchenko.
“I’ll still have my finger, I just won’t be able to bend or move it. Thank goodness that I write with my left hand…”
European qualification won’t cost Empoli’s Nicola Pozzi an arm and a leg, just a finger…