28 players in our squad of which we have one that is HG. That leaves us with the opportunity to register 21 players plus Pinsoglio, right?
Obviously Pjaca and Perin will leave. 26 players left.
I hope and assume Khedira leaves. Arsenal would have signed him for €€€€€€ if it was any other club but they know they can get him for free since it is Juve. 25, four to go.
I suppose we also release another bunch of players from their contracts because all clubs know they don't have to purchase anyone we own. They just ask for freebies and we think like a broke banker that "this would free some space in our wage structure", and then let that person go.
Seemingly Cancelo leaves and Dandildo joins. Yes - that's the best use of him. Still at 25.
So Matuidi is given 10m to leave and we exchange Dybala for Lukaku. 24
Higuain refuses everything so we burn up Mario's house, in fear for his family's safety he runs to Manchester. 23
Rugani is Italian. But he is owned by Juventus. So we sell him for 23 silk sheets and promises that if Empoli wins Champions league next year, we will get 70m. We're down to 22. One to go.
Sooo... Fabio looks around... like, shit, what to do? We have 3 GK, 4 CB, 4 LB/RB, 5 CM (of which one will be injured a lot and Can might need more nose fixes). We also have 2 CF and 4 that can play out wide. Three of these spend a lot of time in the medical bay and the fourth is a
34 year old rapist who is not getting any younger. So what to do, what to do... Suddenly Fabio receives a call. It's from Tare, asking him if he wants to offload Cuadrado. Fabio is skeptical, he knows that Cuadrado has to go, but this is also an opportunity. The call is from Tare and not from any club outside of Italy. So he may actually make something from this deal. So they haggle for a while, and finally, they come to a compromise. Cuadrado goes to Lazio, and Simone Inzaghi's 18 year old son, Tommaso, will fly out pizza every Friday to Fabio. Finally, a tired Fabio goes to the fax machine and registers 21+1. A close call. we have seven trained in Italy of eight that needs to be registered. Phew, he made it though. He goes to sleep and dreams of young Italians he can actually sell profitably and playing 'I can't hear youuuuu!' with advisors on setting up a reliable midfield.
I really don't believe in this team. Our offensive players will get injured as much as any other year and most likely even more since Sarri rarely rotates. Our CM is still as much as 'almost' as it has since MVP. Not saying we won't win Serie A, but we're going sideways instead of forward and have a very short-term view.
... yes I am a big cry baby