Diary of a Mad Beppe (1 Viewer)


Optimist Prime
May 29, 2005

Fabio Paratici(FP): Andrea, I got Mendes to meet you for Ronaldo for a round of golf. Are you free? he is waiting on the other line...

Andrea Agnelli (AA): Huh? Ronaldo retired...Do I even golf? Be at the office in 15mins....maybe 4 hours. Just wiat for me there....*click*

FP: Hello? Hello?

*Calls Beppe*

FP: Hey, Beppe...its Para.


FP: Jesus, I don't even know how to respond to that. I'm calling to say Mendes wants to meet AA for golf to discuss Cristiano.

Beppe: I was kidding about Bonaventura. Or was I? Anyway, we sold Cristiano Zanetti in 2009, why would you waste my time and our presidents?

Beppe: Fabio, lets continue, Andrea walked in and still looks drunk he doesn't know how to unlock his phone.

*In walks nedved stage door left*

Nedved: Fabio, did you tell them? What did they say, this is huge!

Max: Alright, you guys got me here what the hell is happening.

FP: I'm trying to tell you guys that Mendes wants to meet Agnelli and the club about Cristiano Ronaldo but Andrea thinks its Ronado#9 and beppe thinks its Cristiano Zanetti.

Beppe: You lying piece of shit I knew what you meant I was kidding. Now, let me call Mendes and set this up I'll take care of it. Everyone sit tight. I got this...

Beppe: Hello, Jorge?

Jorge: This is Jorge.

Beppe: I hear Ronadlo sogno possibile?

Jorge: Who the hell is this? Is this the same guy the prank called Donald Trump on Air Force One? :howler:

Beppe: lol that guy is a legend...but no, its Beppe from Juventus. I'm told you want to play a round of golf...are you a front 9 or a back 9 kind of guy, need to ask because all of us at the office are wondering what kind of guy Andrea is but we can't figure it out.

Jorge: Front 9 - that's how I roll. Yeah, Ronaldo wants out...Juve looks nice, I see your guru @Mark already found he bought a house in Turin with 3 pools. Oh, my ticker shows Juve stock up 2% from the rumors alone. Win win situation, Beppe.

Beppe: Are you trying to out bull shit a bull shitter? I'll tell you who its a win win for, not you. Sit the fuck down and lets hammer out the details. No need for golf unless you, well whatever, you do you.

Jorge: Patching in Ronaldo now...one sec...

Ronald: Fuck, was trying to take a selfie, what did I tell you about texting before you call, Jorge? Whats up? You got Juve on the line? Tell them I want 30m salary.

beppe: 30 million over 4 years? Easy day. Done. Come over and sign.

Ronaldo: No, 30m a year you cheap bastard. God, Khedira was right about you lol

Beppe: Fuck, that's obviously a tough bargain there. Oh, congrats you just caused Sami to lose his renewal, tore that shit up. Ok, 30m can be done.

*hangs up*

*Beppe faxes contract over*

Perez: Everything looks good, good luck there Ronaldo.


Few minutes after closing the deal and contract signed.


Beppe: Guys hold up, I'm going to call Conte and prank him.

Conte: Hello, Beppe how are you?

Beppe: Good, good thank you. Listen, I'm faxing your over something you should be getting it any minute.

Beppe: loooool its a 10 euro bill...bitch we signed Ronaldo from RM

*conte hangs up in anger*



Forza Vesuvio
Sep 13, 2011
credits: Hustini

after credits


summer of 2019


- - - Updated - - -

just +repped everyone on this page to be able to +rep Hustini :D

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