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++ [ originally posted by Chxta ] ++
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Well, according to the article they are meant to stop immediately. But in a country where the president has on more than one occassion shown a disregard for Supreme Court rulings, I doubt that the judgement will be converted into a tangible victory.
In this world, and yes, that includes the United States, multinationals are just too strong...
Anyways, here's to the future...
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Well, according to the article they are meant to stop immediately. But in a country where the president has on more than one occassion shown a disregard for Supreme Court rulings, I doubt that the judgement will be converted into a tangible victory.
In this world, and yes, that includes the United States, multinationals are just too strong...
Anyways, here's to the future...
The 'good' news that at last Africa has a female president thanks to Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf's resounding victory over George Weah in Liberia is supposed to give Nigeria pause to think according to most 'pundits' this way!
Should the next President of Nigeria not also be a woman?
For me, the answer to that is this: bullshit!
Why is it that people make so much noise about the whole gender thing? Has a woman ever even run for President of the United States or of France?
Should the next President of Nigeria not also be a woman?
For me, the answer to that is this: bullshit!
Why is it that people make so much noise about the whole gender thing? Has a woman ever even run for President of the United States or of France?
The Movement for The Defence of Democracy (MDD) was launched last week in Lagos as a pressure group to rescue Nigerian democracy, provide an alternative to the current asphyxiation of the political space by a behemoth called the Peoples Democratic Party, and prevent the drift towards an anarchic one-party state. The group is made up of aggrieved, disgruntled members of the PDP, those who feel that the PDP has been hijacked by power mongers and particularly President Olusegun Obasanjo whose word has since become law within the party and the country, PDP stalwarts who were wrong-footed in the recent PDP zonal congresses, plus a few members of a faction of the Alliance for Democracy who seem to be playing smart politics by fishing in the troubled waters of the PDP and helping to play the role of undertakers.
The full membership list of the MDD is not yet known as there are others in the background: Governors, legislators in every Senatorial district, big party men, and foot-soldiers who are determined to divide the PDP down the middle, and who may possibly show up at the follow up meetings of the group scheduled for December 7 and 12. It is particularly ironic that the city of Lagos was chosen as the venue for the announcement of the birth of the MDD. A few months ago in this same city, PDP leaders held a rally where they promised to ensure a "Tsunami" in the politics of Lagos and sweep Bola Tinubu and his men out of power forever. But now, with the emergence of the MDD, and the implosion within this self-styled "biggest political party in Africa", what is happening to the PDP, is poetic justice: self-inflicted and inevitable.
We do not need any soothsayer to confirm that this is in part, a by-product of the clash between the President and Vice President Atiku Abubakar, whose supporters across the country suddenly became targets of a great witch-hunt by the former's agents. Although a court of law had ordered the PDP to follow due process in its zonal congresses and allow free competition, lists of state executives were faxed to various PDP branches from Abuja and anyone who at any time sounded as if he was critical of the President, was shut out of the party. Old members who started the party even before President Obasanjo joined politics were denied registration cards; the entire exercise became a form of sorcery, such that in virtually every state, the PDP abandoned democracy, opted for tyranny and discouraged free speech. The underlying agenda was: "stop Atiku by all means. Reduce his influence within the party. Make it impossible for him to succeed Baba on the platform of the PDP. And if there is any other person who may prove to be a potential trouble maker, get rid of him, embarrass him or her." Although Vice President Atiku has not identified publicly with the pressure group called the MDD, it is obvious that the group is a coalition of anti-Obasanjo forces; they are driven by anger if not disgust, frustration if not despair.
Senator Mohammed Ohaire (PDP, Kogi Central) summed up the grievances of the group as follows: "There are signs that things are not really going on well with the PDP, especially when a notable personality like myself can be denied registration in my constituency. And all those people that we have struggled (to get into)... positions at ward and local government and state levels can be removed without any cognizance of the efforts that we have put to build up this party, I think something is wrong." He added: "if you own a house, a house that is jointly owned and a mad man comes in and removes all your property and other stakeholders are staying there watching the mad man doing it, what do you expect will happen?" Ohaire is complaining about mad men in the PDP; another PDP stalwart Bamanga Tukur had before him complained about "armed robbers" taking over the party.
The situation in the party has thus degenerated so badly that party members no longer trust each other, they trade abuses; personal differences have become the main preoccupation of a party that is supposed to defend the interests of the people. What does the PDP stand for? When this same party came to power in 1999 and again won majority seats in 2003, its members were so triumphant they behaved like a happy family; they dominated the space like conquerors, and boasted about the future. Other political parties: the AD, ANPP and the odd 27 others were sidelined, or sucked into a grand conspiracy against the people.
Politics in Nigeria is about what anyone can get, it is about allocation and the sharing of resources; for an average politician, in the face of allocation and sharing, party affiliations are unimportant, expediency is all that matters. And so at all levels, members of the AD, ANPP and the other political parties who were supposed to provide an alternative to the PDP simply joined the PDP train. Their big men accepted contracts and political appointments from the ruling party either for themselves or their children. Lawmakers from opposing parties collected money and other forms of inducement from the ruling party.
What has then been demonstrated is the underdeveloped nature of Nigerian politics and the failure of the country's political party system. Politics in Nigeria is about the self not the common good; political parties do not promote ideas or programmes; they are vehicles for self-promotion and enrichment. The party that holds majority power can distribute patronage and compromise the entire political party system. The PDP in six years has been the champion of this vision-less, direction-less politics. It is invariably a kind of politics that focuses on personalities rather than ideas; territorial control rather than the people. And so, it was inevitable that the PDP soon found itself in self-fulfilling turf wars. In every state, this turf war has taken democracy out of the governance process, it presents the PDP as a party of power mongers without principles.
Femi Okurounmu writing in the Tribune (November 16) has said that the break-away faction of the PDP that has now formed the MDD is a renegade faction that is opposed to the reform or "internal cleansing" or "purification" (!) that President Obasanjo is carrying out in the PDP. Okurounmu's pro-Obasanjo, anti-Atiku, anti-Tinubu analysis plays politics with the subject, definitely the recent PDP congresses do not point to any reform or revolution. He writes: "The recent ward, local government and state congresses of the party indicate clearly that the president wants to sanitize it, give it focus, instill discipline and use it to move the nation in a reformist direction. It will be no exaggeration to call the current happenings in the party a revolution. It is however a revolution that is welcome to those who have always argued that a political party must have clearly defined goals that bind its members, that its members must be subject to party discipline and that money should not be the dominant factor that provides access to leadership positions but rather the commitment and loyalty of individuals to the overall goals of the party. The recent congresses of the PDP are clearly suggestive of reforms along these lines." But oh no, Okurounmu is wrong!
In an editorial, the Vanguard newspaper (November 17) says the MDD is a welcome development, because an alternative voice in Nigerian politics is urgently required. The New Age in its November 17 editorial opinion says the emergence of the MDD is "perhaps the most significant political development since the return to democracy in 1999" But can we trust the MDD? It is true that alternative voices are urgently needed at the moment in Nigerian politics. The political space has been taken over by only one theme: 2007 and the politics of succession, extension and exclusion. There is also great anxiety about the future.
There can be no doubt about this: we need alternative voices that can remind the politicians in the PDP and elsewhere that the future of this country is greater than the dreams of self-appointed messiahs. We need voices that can articulate the basic priorities that we need to address as a nation. Our institutions have failed. INEC is a political party of sorts. The main political parties do not respect court rulings... We need to reinvent the political party system, and draw up a transparent electoral framework. Political parties are supposed to be mirrors and expressions of the people's choices and aspirations. They seek power to promote a vision of society and translate same into programmes for the benefit of the people. Alas, our political parties are special purpose vehicles for getting into public office; the process of social and political advancement is truncated; the PDP in particular has been handed over to one man.
The euphoria over the emergence of the MDD may have arisen over the comfort that is derived from the fact that nemesis has at last caught up with the PDP. But the MDD can only become an alternative if it is driven by high ideals. The group is populated by the same old brigade, by the same men and women who are part of the Nigerian problem. To provide an alternative or quality opposition, anger or disgust is not enough. A new movement that is built on hate or disaffection is not what we seek in the long run. The MDD should not be driven simplistically by a revolt against Obasanjo or a desperate search for power and relevance.
It can only become an alternative if it is driven by clearly enunciated policies and programmes, and if its men and women inspire confidence. The danger is that some of the spokespersons for the MDD sound as if the group is a blackmail construct: that is, if some of the aggrieved members are appeased and re-integrated into the PDP mainstream, they would most likely stay inside the PDP. No great movement can be built on such an opportunistic foundation. Nigerians do not want another party like the PDP which is organised strictly for the purpose of gaining power, for witch-hunt and thievery.
All things considered, Nigerian politicians, whatever may be their affiliation, have failed Nigerians. Great nations are built by political and pressure groups, by men and women who subordinate their private urges to the needs of the people. In Nigeria, there is too much hypocrisy. Every man who goes into politics wants to ride a bullet proof car, keep money in foreign bank accounts, build houses in every state capital and own an oil block through which he can collect rent from the Nigerian state. Every big man wants to use his position to steal opportunities for his own sons and daughters, for his wives and concubines, and for the many sycophants that surround him. It doesn't matter if the people have no food to eat, no schools in which their children can be taught and prepared for the future, no hospitals where access to quality healthcare can be guaranteed, no roads on which they can travel...This is the legacy of the past six years.
Sadly, there is no single person in Nigerian politics today who commands a large national following and who can serve as the symbol for national progress. Obasanjo could have risen to that status but he has allowed himself to return to the original level of a village royal chief, and if he further allows himself to be tempted by the thieves who are campaigning that he should remain in power beyond 2007, he would have destroyed whatever is left of his hard-earned place in the public arena. When he eventually leaves office, he would be no better than the prisoner of Minna!
It is unfortunate that as the politicians jostle for power and the legislators watch the pendulum of political influence, the machinery of governance is gradually grinding to a halt. Mark my words, by January 2006, no real governance would take place again in Nigeria; it is the game of political survival that would dominate public discourse fully and unfortunately. Already, every politician is looking for where to pitch tent: with Obasanjo or Atiku, with the democrats or the dictators, with the constitutionalists or the buccaneers, the federalists or the power mongers?
The greatest disservice that the PDP has done to Nigerians is to reduce Nigeria's Fourth Republic to a choice between two political camps and personalities.
The full membership list of the MDD is not yet known as there are others in the background: Governors, legislators in every Senatorial district, big party men, and foot-soldiers who are determined to divide the PDP down the middle, and who may possibly show up at the follow up meetings of the group scheduled for December 7 and 12. It is particularly ironic that the city of Lagos was chosen as the venue for the announcement of the birth of the MDD. A few months ago in this same city, PDP leaders held a rally where they promised to ensure a "Tsunami" in the politics of Lagos and sweep Bola Tinubu and his men out of power forever. But now, with the emergence of the MDD, and the implosion within this self-styled "biggest political party in Africa", what is happening to the PDP, is poetic justice: self-inflicted and inevitable.
We do not need any soothsayer to confirm that this is in part, a by-product of the clash between the President and Vice President Atiku Abubakar, whose supporters across the country suddenly became targets of a great witch-hunt by the former's agents. Although a court of law had ordered the PDP to follow due process in its zonal congresses and allow free competition, lists of state executives were faxed to various PDP branches from Abuja and anyone who at any time sounded as if he was critical of the President, was shut out of the party. Old members who started the party even before President Obasanjo joined politics were denied registration cards; the entire exercise became a form of sorcery, such that in virtually every state, the PDP abandoned democracy, opted for tyranny and discouraged free speech. The underlying agenda was: "stop Atiku by all means. Reduce his influence within the party. Make it impossible for him to succeed Baba on the platform of the PDP. And if there is any other person who may prove to be a potential trouble maker, get rid of him, embarrass him or her." Although Vice President Atiku has not identified publicly with the pressure group called the MDD, it is obvious that the group is a coalition of anti-Obasanjo forces; they are driven by anger if not disgust, frustration if not despair.
Senator Mohammed Ohaire (PDP, Kogi Central) summed up the grievances of the group as follows: "There are signs that things are not really going on well with the PDP, especially when a notable personality like myself can be denied registration in my constituency. And all those people that we have struggled (to get into)... positions at ward and local government and state levels can be removed without any cognizance of the efforts that we have put to build up this party, I think something is wrong." He added: "if you own a house, a house that is jointly owned and a mad man comes in and removes all your property and other stakeholders are staying there watching the mad man doing it, what do you expect will happen?" Ohaire is complaining about mad men in the PDP; another PDP stalwart Bamanga Tukur had before him complained about "armed robbers" taking over the party.
The situation in the party has thus degenerated so badly that party members no longer trust each other, they trade abuses; personal differences have become the main preoccupation of a party that is supposed to defend the interests of the people. What does the PDP stand for? When this same party came to power in 1999 and again won majority seats in 2003, its members were so triumphant they behaved like a happy family; they dominated the space like conquerors, and boasted about the future. Other political parties: the AD, ANPP and the odd 27 others were sidelined, or sucked into a grand conspiracy against the people.
Politics in Nigeria is about what anyone can get, it is about allocation and the sharing of resources; for an average politician, in the face of allocation and sharing, party affiliations are unimportant, expediency is all that matters. And so at all levels, members of the AD, ANPP and the other political parties who were supposed to provide an alternative to the PDP simply joined the PDP train. Their big men accepted contracts and political appointments from the ruling party either for themselves or their children. Lawmakers from opposing parties collected money and other forms of inducement from the ruling party.
What has then been demonstrated is the underdeveloped nature of Nigerian politics and the failure of the country's political party system. Politics in Nigeria is about the self not the common good; political parties do not promote ideas or programmes; they are vehicles for self-promotion and enrichment. The party that holds majority power can distribute patronage and compromise the entire political party system. The PDP in six years has been the champion of this vision-less, direction-less politics. It is invariably a kind of politics that focuses on personalities rather than ideas; territorial control rather than the people. And so, it was inevitable that the PDP soon found itself in self-fulfilling turf wars. In every state, this turf war has taken democracy out of the governance process, it presents the PDP as a party of power mongers without principles.
Femi Okurounmu writing in the Tribune (November 16) has said that the break-away faction of the PDP that has now formed the MDD is a renegade faction that is opposed to the reform or "internal cleansing" or "purification" (!) that President Obasanjo is carrying out in the PDP. Okurounmu's pro-Obasanjo, anti-Atiku, anti-Tinubu analysis plays politics with the subject, definitely the recent PDP congresses do not point to any reform or revolution. He writes: "The recent ward, local government and state congresses of the party indicate clearly that the president wants to sanitize it, give it focus, instill discipline and use it to move the nation in a reformist direction. It will be no exaggeration to call the current happenings in the party a revolution. It is however a revolution that is welcome to those who have always argued that a political party must have clearly defined goals that bind its members, that its members must be subject to party discipline and that money should not be the dominant factor that provides access to leadership positions but rather the commitment and loyalty of individuals to the overall goals of the party. The recent congresses of the PDP are clearly suggestive of reforms along these lines." But oh no, Okurounmu is wrong!
In an editorial, the Vanguard newspaper (November 17) says the MDD is a welcome development, because an alternative voice in Nigerian politics is urgently required. The New Age in its November 17 editorial opinion says the emergence of the MDD is "perhaps the most significant political development since the return to democracy in 1999" But can we trust the MDD? It is true that alternative voices are urgently needed at the moment in Nigerian politics. The political space has been taken over by only one theme: 2007 and the politics of succession, extension and exclusion. There is also great anxiety about the future.
There can be no doubt about this: we need alternative voices that can remind the politicians in the PDP and elsewhere that the future of this country is greater than the dreams of self-appointed messiahs. We need voices that can articulate the basic priorities that we need to address as a nation. Our institutions have failed. INEC is a political party of sorts. The main political parties do not respect court rulings... We need to reinvent the political party system, and draw up a transparent electoral framework. Political parties are supposed to be mirrors and expressions of the people's choices and aspirations. They seek power to promote a vision of society and translate same into programmes for the benefit of the people. Alas, our political parties are special purpose vehicles for getting into public office; the process of social and political advancement is truncated; the PDP in particular has been handed over to one man.
The euphoria over the emergence of the MDD may have arisen over the comfort that is derived from the fact that nemesis has at last caught up with the PDP. But the MDD can only become an alternative if it is driven by high ideals. The group is populated by the same old brigade, by the same men and women who are part of the Nigerian problem. To provide an alternative or quality opposition, anger or disgust is not enough. A new movement that is built on hate or disaffection is not what we seek in the long run. The MDD should not be driven simplistically by a revolt against Obasanjo or a desperate search for power and relevance.
It can only become an alternative if it is driven by clearly enunciated policies and programmes, and if its men and women inspire confidence. The danger is that some of the spokespersons for the MDD sound as if the group is a blackmail construct: that is, if some of the aggrieved members are appeased and re-integrated into the PDP mainstream, they would most likely stay inside the PDP. No great movement can be built on such an opportunistic foundation. Nigerians do not want another party like the PDP which is organised strictly for the purpose of gaining power, for witch-hunt and thievery.
All things considered, Nigerian politicians, whatever may be their affiliation, have failed Nigerians. Great nations are built by political and pressure groups, by men and women who subordinate their private urges to the needs of the people. In Nigeria, there is too much hypocrisy. Every man who goes into politics wants to ride a bullet proof car, keep money in foreign bank accounts, build houses in every state capital and own an oil block through which he can collect rent from the Nigerian state. Every big man wants to use his position to steal opportunities for his own sons and daughters, for his wives and concubines, and for the many sycophants that surround him. It doesn't matter if the people have no food to eat, no schools in which their children can be taught and prepared for the future, no hospitals where access to quality healthcare can be guaranteed, no roads on which they can travel...This is the legacy of the past six years.
Sadly, there is no single person in Nigerian politics today who commands a large national following and who can serve as the symbol for national progress. Obasanjo could have risen to that status but he has allowed himself to return to the original level of a village royal chief, and if he further allows himself to be tempted by the thieves who are campaigning that he should remain in power beyond 2007, he would have destroyed whatever is left of his hard-earned place in the public arena. When he eventually leaves office, he would be no better than the prisoner of Minna!
It is unfortunate that as the politicians jostle for power and the legislators watch the pendulum of political influence, the machinery of governance is gradually grinding to a halt. Mark my words, by January 2006, no real governance would take place again in Nigeria; it is the game of political survival that would dominate public discourse fully and unfortunately. Already, every politician is looking for where to pitch tent: with Obasanjo or Atiku, with the democrats or the dictators, with the constitutionalists or the buccaneers, the federalists or the power mongers?
The greatest disservice that the PDP has done to Nigerians is to reduce Nigeria's Fourth Republic to a choice between two political camps and personalities.
Source
I just find it hard to believe that the bobo went through Heathrow and didn't raise any alarm bells. The UK government must have known he was leaving or he was going to leave and just granted him bail because the case was going to be awkward and if DSP was convicted the whole thing would stop other governors putting their stolen cash in UK banks and buying properties worth millions in London.
Shame has totally disappeared from the lexicon of these governors. A criminal who just absconded went to govt house to pray. Ogboju ole. The irony is lost on these fools, walai.
Bayelsa people celebrating are just monkeys that will continue to live in that zoo for a long time.
I just find it hard to believe that the bobo went through Heathrow and didn't raise any alarm bells. The UK government must have known he was leaving or he was going to leave and just granted him bail because the case was going to be awkward and if DSP was convicted the whole thing would stop other governors putting their stolen cash in UK banks and buying properties worth millions in London.
Shame has totally disappeared from the lexicon of these governors. A criminal who just absconded went to govt house to pray. Ogboju ole. The irony is lost on these fools, walai.
Bayelsa people celebrating are just monkeys that will continue to live in that zoo for a long time.
The bottom line Besmir is that a Nigerian governor who stole public funds, but enjoys immunity from prosecution while in office was arrested in the UK. Then jumped bail.
I'm tired, long day at work. See you guys tommorow hopefully, I want to crawl into bed.
I'll try and expand my scope Dan. Promise!
I'm tired, long day at work. See you guys tommorow hopefully, I want to crawl into bed.
I'll try and expand my scope Dan. Promise!
None that I've noticed so far...
What do you think about Sharon's leaving the Likud? Personally I think it is a step in the right direction because that party was full of people who were just fucking scared of change, and that wasn't doing anyone any good.
The peace process is the only way Israel can begin to live like a normal country. Those who keep trying to derail it (and IMO there are more Israelis trying to do so) are just myopic individuals who have no feeling for the majority who just want to get on with their lives...
What do you think about Sharon's leaving the Likud? Personally I think it is a step in the right direction because that party was full of people who were just fucking scared of change, and that wasn't doing anyone any good.
The peace process is the only way Israel can begin to live like a normal country. Those who keep trying to derail it (and IMO there are more Israelis trying to do so) are just myopic individuals who have no feeling for the majority who just want to get on with their lives...
I hate going intimate or emotional online, that’s the recent me for you. But I just had to spit out these little bits and pieces on friendship.
When talking to girls how many of you have heard them go “I prefer to hang out with guys. It guarantees less drama jare”. Yes, that’s what a lot of the ladies say. But you won’t hear a guy say “I prefer to hang out with girls”.
Instead you’ll hear “I like to hang out with my mens but if it’s with a chick we’ve gots to be friends with benefits”. Sad but true: a girl’s friendship circle is the most unstable thing after NEPA. I blame it on fact that girls are like the receptive specie. Guys are the active ones. They do the pampering and make the moves while the girls choose from the options offered to them.
Looks matter in everyday life but it so much matters when it comes to girls. They gots to look their best always and go through all that: will this guy like me, how can I keep admirers to myself shit. And when you’re steadily under competition friendship ain’t an easy thing. I’ve been in social groups involving both sexes and I tell you the pretty girls are the most popular girls and the ones with the best self esteem. On the other hand friendship is a relatively easier thing for guys.
Proof of this can be seen in the Nigerian University housing system where at times as many as 11 guys stay together in a room and they get along fairly peacefully. Anyway, this hanging out with guys stuff works for girls cos in most cases the guys are so daft. They’re ready to follow the girl around all day and even spend big-time on her; not because they like her on platonic terms but because they got hopes of getting a kiss, a hug or hitting it proper one day. Hey…fuck this, over to the next paragraph!
There’s something that the Psychologists say about friendship. That it’s born out of our greedy personal desires. That friendship is all about using each other to get a little something-something. Example: a buddy to hang out with and keep you from being bored, a bedmate or lover to fill your emotional needs, a study, business or political partner to get you right educationally, money-wise or politically. But whatever it is I hate to loose a friend. I try my best to be a good pal always. But if the worst happens (like it has a few times of late) I try to keep my lines open just incase. I don’t want to find myself in a bad mood blabbing about friendship woes like some peeps do. The advice I’ll give is exactly the same I gave in a previous mail. Be nice 24-7 and try to put yourself in other’s shoes before taking actions. That way you can stop spending a fortune buying all them self help books you buy weekly: “how to keep and win friends”, “understanding the human temperaments”, etc.
Still with the topic, I fear I could loose some of my friends and I’m afraid of what the status of our friendship will be in years to come. You know you grow up with friends, meet some in school and at the end of the day you guys head into different directions in life. Some make it big, some end up fairly off and some struggle all the way. Each finds his/her own class and sticks to it. And that’s all because money is a leveler. I don’t mean it in the normal way you might know but that money is an element that certifies one’s “levels” (importance) in society. Remember the line from 50 Cent’s “wanksta” song?
“Damn homie, in High school you was the man homie, what the fuck happened to you?”.
That’s real depressing, especially when you consider that it could happen to you. Check this. I got into some silly argument with my younger cousin who turned 19 some weeks back. She threw the words, I threw the fist (she really pissed me off!). In the end I got my new radio smashed to bits and pieces (it sure has thought me a lesson for life: never hit a lady) which along with my computer were amongst my most cherished material possessions. And right now things aren't too cool between us…you know the ego thing. But imagine my cousin paying my bills one day…when she makes it as an actress (that’s what she wants to be and she really is the lively type). And when I’ll then be better known not as Chxta but as Amaka’s brother. Aaahhh, Crazy!
Life isn’t a fairy tale; you can’t be a child forever. Now that we’ve all finished school and my mens and I have entered the labour market that masculine psyche thing about making that money is increasingly scaring the shit out of me.
That’s how it is now, that’s how it’ll always be/
I’ll never change this is always me/
from the womb to the tomb, from now to my doom/
drink army from one cup pass it around the room/
that’s the ritual, Big Gran I ain’t forgot you fool/
and all that bullshit you trying to get through/
this is crew love, move music or move drugs/
rival crews get cha black suits up/
I’ll never change…
That’s Jay-Z on “never change” spitting some brotherhood shit. We (my friends and I, you and your friends) all got our childhood dreams. Hope we hit 70 having fulfilled part of it or at least being satisfied with our lives. Shout out to my peeps, Peace!
Thanks Trae
When talking to girls how many of you have heard them go “I prefer to hang out with guys. It guarantees less drama jare”. Yes, that’s what a lot of the ladies say. But you won’t hear a guy say “I prefer to hang out with girls”.
Instead you’ll hear “I like to hang out with my mens but if it’s with a chick we’ve gots to be friends with benefits”. Sad but true: a girl’s friendship circle is the most unstable thing after NEPA. I blame it on fact that girls are like the receptive specie. Guys are the active ones. They do the pampering and make the moves while the girls choose from the options offered to them.
Looks matter in everyday life but it so much matters when it comes to girls. They gots to look their best always and go through all that: will this guy like me, how can I keep admirers to myself shit. And when you’re steadily under competition friendship ain’t an easy thing. I’ve been in social groups involving both sexes and I tell you the pretty girls are the most popular girls and the ones with the best self esteem. On the other hand friendship is a relatively easier thing for guys.
Proof of this can be seen in the Nigerian University housing system where at times as many as 11 guys stay together in a room and they get along fairly peacefully. Anyway, this hanging out with guys stuff works for girls cos in most cases the guys are so daft. They’re ready to follow the girl around all day and even spend big-time on her; not because they like her on platonic terms but because they got hopes of getting a kiss, a hug or hitting it proper one day. Hey…fuck this, over to the next paragraph!
There’s something that the Psychologists say about friendship. That it’s born out of our greedy personal desires. That friendship is all about using each other to get a little something-something. Example: a buddy to hang out with and keep you from being bored, a bedmate or lover to fill your emotional needs, a study, business or political partner to get you right educationally, money-wise or politically. But whatever it is I hate to loose a friend. I try my best to be a good pal always. But if the worst happens (like it has a few times of late) I try to keep my lines open just incase. I don’t want to find myself in a bad mood blabbing about friendship woes like some peeps do. The advice I’ll give is exactly the same I gave in a previous mail. Be nice 24-7 and try to put yourself in other’s shoes before taking actions. That way you can stop spending a fortune buying all them self help books you buy weekly: “how to keep and win friends”, “understanding the human temperaments”, etc.
Still with the topic, I fear I could loose some of my friends and I’m afraid of what the status of our friendship will be in years to come. You know you grow up with friends, meet some in school and at the end of the day you guys head into different directions in life. Some make it big, some end up fairly off and some struggle all the way. Each finds his/her own class and sticks to it. And that’s all because money is a leveler. I don’t mean it in the normal way you might know but that money is an element that certifies one’s “levels” (importance) in society. Remember the line from 50 Cent’s “wanksta” song?
“Damn homie, in High school you was the man homie, what the fuck happened to you?”.
That’s real depressing, especially when you consider that it could happen to you. Check this. I got into some silly argument with my younger cousin who turned 19 some weeks back. She threw the words, I threw the fist (she really pissed me off!). In the end I got my new radio smashed to bits and pieces (it sure has thought me a lesson for life: never hit a lady) which along with my computer were amongst my most cherished material possessions. And right now things aren't too cool between us…you know the ego thing. But imagine my cousin paying my bills one day…when she makes it as an actress (that’s what she wants to be and she really is the lively type). And when I’ll then be better known not as Chxta but as Amaka’s brother. Aaahhh, Crazy!
Life isn’t a fairy tale; you can’t be a child forever. Now that we’ve all finished school and my mens and I have entered the labour market that masculine psyche thing about making that money is increasingly scaring the shit out of me.
That’s how it is now, that’s how it’ll always be/
I’ll never change this is always me/
from the womb to the tomb, from now to my doom/
drink army from one cup pass it around the room/
that’s the ritual, Big Gran I ain’t forgot you fool/
and all that bullshit you trying to get through/
this is crew love, move music or move drugs/
rival crews get cha black suits up/
I’ll never change…
That’s Jay-Z on “never change” spitting some brotherhood shit. We (my friends and I, you and your friends) all got our childhood dreams. Hope we hit 70 having fulfilled part of it or at least being satisfied with our lives. Shout out to my peeps, Peace!
Thanks Trae
From today's Fiver...
Monday tasks in Fiver Towers: locate Disprin, prop open eyes with
matchsticks, fetch coffee, wipe coffee off keyboard, call IT, regain
semblance of composure, check football results, check what Italian
fans threw on to various Serie A pitches over the weekend. Coins?
Bottles? Phones? Scooters? Corpses? Coliseums? No, this weekend they
opted to hurl racist insults. Again. But a righteous player decided
to take a stand and today Messina defender Marc Zoro received the
backing of the Italian authorities.
In the 66th minute of yesterday's clash between Messina and Inter in
Sicily, Zoro picked up the ball and walked off the pitch in protest
at the monkey chants spewed at him by savage Inter fans. "I was fed
up with it," explained the 21-year-old Ivorian. "It was the classic
treatment of black players in Italy - it happens all over the
country, Lazio fans being the worst," he continued, as Inter defender
and Lazio old boy Sinisa Mihajlovic whistled innocently and looked at
his shoes. Other Inter players expressed their support, however.
Adriano and Obafemi Martins comforted Zoro and persuaded him to
return to the pitch so the match could finish, while Luis Figo and
Juan Veron apologised on behalf of the club. Indeed, even club
kingpin Massimo Moratti today praised Zoro as "an intelligent man who
acted in a brave and intelligent way". But not everyone at Inter was
impressed: "[Centre-back and Everton legend Marco] Materazzi shouted
'stop that, Zoro, you're just trying to make a name for yourself',"
revealed Zoro. "I didn't even argue with him, I've no intention of
lowering myself to that level."
The Italian FA have announced that next week all league fixtures will
kick off five minutes late so that players can unfurl "no to racism"
banners. Not as inventive as Treviso players who recently showed
their disdain for racism by painting their faces black; but noble
and, of course, absolutely foolproof. Racist loo-laas will never
think of turning up five minutes later than usual, or ... gosh,
totally ignoring the plea. And it seems Italian clubs will never
pluck up the courage to confront the all-powerful fans in the Curvas
- and boot the belligerent morons out.
Monday tasks in Fiver Towers: locate Disprin, prop open eyes with
matchsticks, fetch coffee, wipe coffee off keyboard, call IT, regain
semblance of composure, check football results, check what Italian
fans threw on to various Serie A pitches over the weekend. Coins?
Bottles? Phones? Scooters? Corpses? Coliseums? No, this weekend they
opted to hurl racist insults. Again. But a righteous player decided
to take a stand and today Messina defender Marc Zoro received the
backing of the Italian authorities.
In the 66th minute of yesterday's clash between Messina and Inter in
Sicily, Zoro picked up the ball and walked off the pitch in protest
at the monkey chants spewed at him by savage Inter fans. "I was fed
up with it," explained the 21-year-old Ivorian. "It was the classic
treatment of black players in Italy - it happens all over the
country, Lazio fans being the worst," he continued, as Inter defender
and Lazio old boy Sinisa Mihajlovic whistled innocently and looked at
his shoes. Other Inter players expressed their support, however.
Adriano and Obafemi Martins comforted Zoro and persuaded him to
return to the pitch so the match could finish, while Luis Figo and
Juan Veron apologised on behalf of the club. Indeed, even club
kingpin Massimo Moratti today praised Zoro as "an intelligent man who
acted in a brave and intelligent way". But not everyone at Inter was
impressed: "[Centre-back and Everton legend Marco] Materazzi shouted
'stop that, Zoro, you're just trying to make a name for yourself',"
revealed Zoro. "I didn't even argue with him, I've no intention of
lowering myself to that level."
The Italian FA have announced that next week all league fixtures will
kick off five minutes late so that players can unfurl "no to racism"
banners. Not as inventive as Treviso players who recently showed
their disdain for racism by painting their faces black; but noble
and, of course, absolutely foolproof. Racist loo-laas will never
think of turning up five minutes later than usual, or ... gosh,
totally ignoring the plea. And it seems Italian clubs will never
pluck up the courage to confront the all-powerful fans in the Curvas
- and boot the belligerent morons out.
First off let me say i enjoyed reading the whole thing, very interesting and very insightful. You should write more stuff like this on your blog.
Its true, friendships dont last forever, someone moves to another town, someone finds a woman to settle down with and yada yada. I used to think me and my friends would hang forever because we always had each others backs and we were around each other every single day. There was like 8 of us. I lost touch with everyone but 2 and even them i dont speak to very often. It makes me vey sad because we were all like brothers back in the day.
On another note, that 50 cent line, "what the fuck happened to you?" is one of my biggest fears. That one of the people im on bad terms with will make it big and i just know the envy would kill me. What makes me feel good though is that i think i will be on the other side of the coin and i will be the one to make it big.
Anyway, this is a very good post which helped me remember some crucial things i had forgotten. Thank you very much for that.
Its true, friendships dont last forever, someone moves to another town, someone finds a woman to settle down with and yada yada. I used to think me and my friends would hang forever because we always had each others backs and we were around each other every single day. There was like 8 of us. I lost touch with everyone but 2 and even them i dont speak to very often. It makes me vey sad because we were all like brothers back in the day.
On another note, that 50 cent line, "what the fuck happened to you?" is one of my biggest fears. That one of the people im on bad terms with will make it big and i just know the envy would kill me. What makes me feel good though is that i think i will be on the other side of the coin and i will be the one to make it big.
Anyway, this is a very good post which helped me remember some crucial things i had forgotten. Thank you very much for that.
New site feature. Look at the bottom left of each post. The add rep button lets you add to or take awat from someone's reputation based on what you think of their post. So if someone writes something intelligent, informative or witty, add rep. If they're starting fights, etc. take it away. That green rectangle on the left is a measure of your reputation. Swag has two, everyone else is stuck with one! 
New site feature. Look at the bottom left of each post. The add rep button lets you add to or take awat from someone's reputation based on what you think of their post. So if someone writes something intelligent, informative or witty, add rep. If they're starting fights, etc. take it away. That green rectangle on the left is a measure of your reputation. Swag has two, everyone else is stuck with one!
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Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur.
Thx for the help, i sopose you want one too for that info you just gave