Oh, you know, Diabetes took a major turn for the worse, ended up in the hospital at Martha's Vineyard while I was on vacation, all that good stuff.
New radical medication that is considered a Tier 3 drug because it only got FDA Approved in Frebruary, with every possible side effect known to mankind short on impotence, and well, death.
Its taken my body about 8 days to get used to the new injection, which, buy the way, my doctor informs me today that I now need to DOUBLE my dosage.
And increase the dosage of the pills that I was taking as well.
Just put a gun to my fucking head, man.
This fucking sucks, man. I can't remember feeling this down in a long time. Its a constant struggle with my body and mind, and sometimes I just sit up at night and cry while my wife is sleeping. I feel as if I'm going back to depression again.
Yeah, my sugar has been under 200 the last couple of days for the first time in a month, but how much more medication can I possibly take? This new drug is supposed to help with wieght loss, and I'm currently at 245 lbs, considering that I'm almost 6'4" that wouldn't be so bad right? But the problem is that the fat I have on my body is around my waist and starting to get under my chin, so losing 20-25 pounds puts me right back to where I was when I posted my pics 5 years ago, which is where I want to be.
I feel like giving up, and then I look at my wife, and I remember how upset she was at the hospital with the nurses coming to give her a hug as they were putting what amounted to three full IV's fo fluid into me, and I know that she is what I have to live for. Just the sight of her crying and her lip trembling just really made me stop and think that once and for all, I have to beat this.
