What Are You Doing Right Now? (162 Viewers)

[Enron]

oh I have no problem with it being a public post, i think it's a pretty regular thing for immigrants when they visit their parents country.

the thing is that it feels like I have two conflicting poles pulling me in differing directions at the moment. I've wandered around with these thoughts for some time, but this visit to Sarajevo / Belgrade / Podgorica really set something off that I'm not quite done thinking through or dealing with just yet.

The reality is:

I was born in 91 in Sarajevo and we arrived in Denmark in April 1992. This means that I have no recollection of that country or that period at all - everything I know about it is something I've heard / read. I know the language and my parents have done a very astute job at raising me in such a way that right about now I'd decide for myself how I feel, they just gave me all the tools so I could make that choice on my own rather than cramming something down my throat.

The problem:

I feel like I'm two different persona's, one guy when I'm here in Denmark, with this set of friends and this social circle, and a completely different guy when I'm down there (unspecified as I have mini-societies which I slip into where ever I go). Through this dual persona that I have going on, I've started asking my self questions and evaluating my surroundings much more - basically a question of "which one do I like more?". And this question is the one nagging me. The Danish state gave me everything ( my parents weren't treated that nicely, but aside from one or two incidents I can't say that I've been treated any different than a standard danish kid would've been ), and yet I don't really feel at home when I walk down a street in Copenhagen. The only time I feel at home or like I belong is when I'm with the friends I have here, who again are Danish - so why the hell wouldn't I feel at home in Denmark? I can't get past that one.

When I'm down there it's like heaven on earth for me. So many of the things that nag me about the danish society just do not exist down there, but then again my very rosy view on life in the central balkans might stem from the fact that I come down there with money from Denmark and have no material issues at all when I'm down there. I understand all this, the situation is shit in all the X-yugoslav republics and whoever tells you different is a fucking liar, yet I can't help but feel like I would like to pack my suitcases and go down there tomorrow, if I could.

So, that's just some of the very random thoughts I'm struggling with as of late, it might seem uncoherent to someone who is reading it, but I guess I'm just not skilled enough in the art of writing the English language to fully express how complex it is to me ,or perhaps it's because I'm not done chewing it. Anyways, there is a lot more, but I don't want to write a 36.000 character essay on my little existential crisis .

Nothing wrong with any of that. People tend to adapt to the groups they interact within. You just have to realize that these different versions of yourself are still you even though you may alter your behavior from one setting to the next. This isn't a crisis, it's standard. Just more polarized because you happen to hold nostalgiac reverence for the place you "come from".

---------- Post added 15.08.2012 at 16:29 ----------

they borrowed it, if they actually sold an album perhaps i'd get some royalties

It's actually pretty decent. Probably somewhere in my car.

 

Buy on AliExpress.com

[AndreaCristiano]

serious post: I thought it would be easier for you considering you have a pretty uniform set of morals due to your religion.

That's all fine but I was talking about community morals but I see what you mean

 

[Enron]

It's not that I don't fit in. It's just different when I'm around my culture and speaking my language and having the same morals ,ideals etc etc with people who are not Italian or of Italian decent it's different that's all. Not in a bad way just different set of beliefs etc

Are you sure you don't mean behavior? Morals and beliefs are finite, are they not?

Anyway, this is normal.

---------- Post added 15.08.2012 at 16:32 ----------

That's all fine but I was talking about community morals but I see what you mean

By community morals I hope you're not meaning a "gang bang".

On a serious note, what do you mean by that?

 

[swag]

Never, but I hate liquorice.

Maybe all those extra characters you Canucks need to spell things properly are at the root of the problem. But my wife doesn't like licorice either. That didn't stop her from calling it her favorite gelato after that.

 

[Nzoric]

Nothing wrong with any of that. People tend to adapt to the groups they interact within. You just have to realize that these different versions of yourself are still you even though you may alter your behavior from one setting to the next. This isn't a crisis, it's standard. Just more polarized because you happen to hold nostalgiac reverence for the place you "come from".

that make sense, except i don't understand where that nostalgic reverence comes from considering I never really gave it a thought until before my 19th birthday or so. it's not that i disagree with your post but that angle didn't really give me any peace of mind either, sadly. It still feels like a crisis

It's actually pretty decent. Probably somewhere in my car.

I like it, not as good as Tool but definitely enjoyable. I'm still trying to get a hold of a bottle of his wine

---------- Post added 15.08.2012 at 20:36 ----------

Are you sure you don't mean behavior? Morals and beliefs are finite, are they not?

what do you mean with "are finite"?

 

[ALC]

Are you sure you don't mean behavior? Morals and beliefs are finite, are they not?

Anyway, this is normal.

---------- Post added 15.08.2012 at 16:32 ----------



By community morals I hope you're not meaning a "gang bang".

On a serious note, what do you mean by that?

I think he just means behavior and way people act. Not morals per se.

 

[Nzoric]

I think he just means behavior and way people act. Not morals per se.

this shiptar can probably relate to what i'm talking about

 

[AndreaCristiano]

Are you sure you don't mean behavior? Morals and beliefs are finite, are they not?

Anyway, this is normal.

---------- Post added 15.08.2012 at 16:32 ----------



By community morals I hope you're not meaning a "gang bang".

On a serious note, what do you mean by that?

Well for instance discipline of children, family life and workings, etc

 

[ALC]

this shiptar can probably relate to what i'm talking about

*Shqiptar. And I moved when I was 13 so I get what you mean. But it really depends on who you hang with. In HS, that difference was more prevalent cuz you'd hang out with everyone and whatnot. But now, when you pick your friends, you pick ones you fit with more.

Still, going back there is always awesome and feels like nothing else.

 

[Enron]

that make sense, except i don't understand where that nostalgic reverence comes from considering I never really gave it a thought until before my 19th birthday or so. it's not that i disagree with your post but that angle didn't really give me any peace of mind either, sadly. It still feels like a crisis




I like it, not as good as Tool but definitely enjoyable. I'm still trying to get a hold of a bottle of his wine

1) I don't see how this is a crisis. People are supposed to be complex. The nostalgiac reverence comes from you having visited your homeland and wanting to help make it better. You don't have to pick between being Serb or Danish. Be whichever you like, or be both, or neither. Do something or don't do anything. It doesn't make you a bad person no matter what you choose.

2) It's difficult to find unless you're willing to order a case.

 

[AndreaCristiano]

*Shqiptar. And I moved when I was 13 so I get what you mean. But it really depends on who you hang with. In HS, that difference was more prevalent cuz you'd hang out with everyone and whatnot. But now, when you pick your friends, you pick ones you fit with more.

Still, going back there is always awesome and feels like nothing else.

Exactly hit the nail on the head brother!

 

[Enron]

Well for instance discipline of children, family life and workings, etc

Oh yeah, cultural differences. I could see that. Probably makes it easier to adapt to the cultural differences of the country you are visiting.

 

[Nzoric]

*Shqiptar. And I moved when I was 13 so I get what you mean. But it really depends on who you hang with. In HS, that difference was more prevalent cuz you'd hang out with everyone and whatnot. But now, when you pick your friends, you pick ones you fit with more.

Still, going back there is always awesome and feels like nothing else.

perhaps its Shqiptar in your pagan language, but in my language you're just a Shiptar

And I get your point

1) I don't see how this is a crisis. People are supposed to be complex. The nostalgiac reverence comes from you having visited your homeland and wanting to help make it better. You don't have to pick between being Serb or Danish. Be whichever you like, or be both, or neither. Do something or don't do anything. It doesn't make you a bad person no matter what you choose.

2) It's difficult to find unless you're willing to order a case.

That's too easy, for now. But thanks for the input, I'll probably have to think this through for a few more months. Besides, I like sitting with a glass of wine and wallow in my own thoughts from time to time

He's too good a musician for me to trust him to be a good enough wine maker to warrant me buying an entire case of his wine

 

[AndreaCristiano]

Oh yeah, cultural differences. I could see that. Probably makes it easier to adapt to the cultural differences of the country you are visiting.

Yea. For example my fiancé and I click so well because besides the obvious attraction of look and character we come from right off the boat Italian families and all those cultural ideals are the same, food, family, language, mentality etc etc. So it is with my closest friends outside of my family and hers they are all in that same situation. I have friends of many persuasions beside them but the closeness because of that culture will never be achieved outside of it

 

[Enron]

perhaps its Shqiptar in your pagan language, but in my language you're just a Shiptar

And I get your point



That's too easy, for now. But thanks for the input, I'll probably have to think this through for a few more months. Besides, I like sitting with a glass of wine and wallow in my own thoughts from time to time

He's too good a musician for me to trust him to be a good enough wine maker to warrant me buying an entire case of his wine

1) Follow the Razor bro, Hakom knows what's up.

2) If you're in the US it's easier to find a distributor. He supposedly gets solid ratings from critics.

 

[ALC]

Finally bought a new whip yesterday!

Love it!!!

Nice yoo! The new 'stangs are quality. Ford has really stepped their game up. Looks good

perhaps its Shqiptar in your pagan language, but in my language you're just a Shiptar

And I get your point

You'll get used to it But yeah, going back is always a magic time. You said it yourself tho, we go there on vacation and there's no worries whatsoever. Living there all the time would be different. I wouldn't mind it tbh, but I'd have to have some cash or a really good job.

 

[swag]

1) I don't see how this is a crisis. People are supposed to be complex. The nostalgiac reverence comes from you having visited your homeland and wanting to help make it better. You don't have to pick between being Serb or Danish. Be whichever you like, or be both, or neither. Do something or don't do anything. It doesn't make you a bad person no matter what you choose.

That's the universal immigrant story, though. And it's extremely popular the world over. Often you can't easily go 'back' either -- you can end up like the Sopranos going back to Sicily thinking they're one of them, when they are clearly considered anything but by the locals.

 

[The Curr]

Laughing at Arsenal.

 

[swag]

Laughing at Arsenal.

But Podolski says they're challenging for the title.

 

[AndreaCristiano]

Nice yoo! The new 'stangs are quality. Ford has really stepped their game up. Looks good



You'll get used to it But yeah, going back is always a magic time. You said it yourself tho, we go there on vacation and there's no worries whatsoever. Living there all the time would be different. I wouldn't mind it tbh, but I'd have to have some cash or a really good job.

Hell yes! This is gonna be a fun project mwwwuuuhahahahahahaha