Not funny, but true, joke (1 Viewer)

Zlatan

Senior Member
Jun 9, 2003
23,049
#1
A survey was conducted in all of the world, asking people to give their own opinion on food deprivation in the rest of the world, other than their countries, and, suprisingly, it suffered a massive failure.

-Africans didnt know what food was
-Western Europeans didnt know what deprivation was
-Eastern Europeans didnt know what own opinion was
-Americans didnt know what the rest of the world was
 

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Bjerknes

"Top Economist"
Mar 16, 2004
111,472
#6
++ [ originally posted by Seven ] ++
Yeah yeah.. I'm on my way to pass out rice bowls, relax Andy.
:rofl: :rofl:



Yeah, that's right Zlatan, Sergio, Vinman, Greg, Pado and I have no clue what the rest of the world is. Please, enlighten us to this "rest of the world" you speak of. Football is the most popular sport in America; nowhere else because there is nowhere else.
 

Majed

Senior Member
Jul 17, 2002
9,630
#12
++ [ originally posted by DukeVonEggwaffle? ] ++
nothing about middle easterners?

To find an answer to that, read this:

++ [ originally posted by Zlatan ] ++
A survey was conducted in all of the world, asking people to give their own opinion on food deprivation in the rest of the world, other than their countries, and, suprisingly, it suffered a massive failure.

-Africans didnt know what food was
-Western Europeans didnt know what deprivation was
-Eastern Europeans didnt know what own opinion was
-Americans didnt know what the rest of the world was
 

Torkel

f(s+1)=3((s +1)-1=3s
Jul 12, 2002
3,537
#14
++ [ originally posted by swag ] ++
Got any funny, but not true, jokes?
Once upon a time a man walks into a bar. The bar is located on top a hotel, 20 storyes above the ground. The man orders a double vodka, drinks it, bangs his head on the bar and jumps out the window. 5 minutes later he returns while all the people in the bar stare at him amazed.
The man orders another double vodka, drinks it, bangs his head on the bar and jumps out the window again. 5 minutes later he returns. Another man goes up to him and says: "How can you jump out the window like that? You should have died twice already!"
The first man answers:" Drink a double vodka, bang your head on the bar and you can do anything!"
The man buys a double vodka, drinks it, bangs his head on the bar and jumps out the window and dies.
The bartender turns to the first man and says: "You're a real bastard when you're drunk Superman"
 

Seven

In bocca al lupo, Fabio.
Jun 25, 2003
38,185
#17
++ [ originally posted by Torkel ] ++

Once upon a time a man walks into a bar. The bar is located on top a hotel, 20 storyes above the ground. The man orders a double vodka, drinks it, bangs his head on the bar and jumps out the window. 5 minutes later he returns while all the people in the bar stare at him amazed.
The man orders another double vodka, drinks it, bangs his head on the bar and jumps out the window again. 5 minutes later he returns. Another man goes up to him and says: "How can you jump out the window like that? You should have died twice already!"
The first man answers:" Drink a double vodka, bang your head on the bar and you can do anything!"
The man buys a double vodka, drinks it, bangs his head on the bar and jumps out the window and dies.
The bartender turns to the first man and says: "You're a real bastard when you're drunk Superman"
That's a great one :D.
 
Mar 14, 2004
4,926
#18
++ [ originally posted by Andy ] ++
:rofl: :rofl:
Yeah, that's right Zlatan, Sergio, Vinman, Greg, Pado and I have no clue what the rest of the world is. Please, enlighten us to this "rest of the world" you speak of. Football is the most popular sport in America; nowhere else because there is nowhere else.
Sorry,but I have to add something.....in my short time of beeing in states I concluded that 90% of people know SHIT about rest of the world. You mention them Croatia,Slovenia,Romania,Bulgaria,Monaco,Liuthania,Czech,Slovakia(European cases) and they ask you if is it a new sort of burgers in Burger-King or some even bigger stupidities. The little part of them that heard for these countries,suppose that all of them were/are part of Russia....there were even bigger nonsenses like Balkan is northern part of Japan island.....
And when I xplain to them that Croatia isn't country that separates Russia and Alaska they ask me if I had some sheeps and cows there and do I have TV and a car,how do I get along in a big city of Mineapollis,like I live in a fukkin nomads land of vikings and pre-historical half-peoples. I know that there are exceptions there but what I have encountered there in few places.....I can onley conclude that Zlatan's "joke" speaks truth. (Damn,here is one anegdote of my friend.....he was driven by Ghanian taxi-driver in Mineapollis who asked him does he know who Samuel Kuffour is. He mentioned that he was ilegaly transfered into Germany alongside with Kuffour. He knew where Croatia is.)
 

Dragon

Senior Member
Apr 24, 2003
27,407
#19
Read this


Chemistry Exam Question...
>
>The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
>chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so
>"profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the
>Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying
>it as well.
>
>Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
>(absorbs heat)?
>
>Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
>(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some
>variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
>
>
>First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
>need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell, and the
>rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that
>once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are
>leaving.
>
>As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
>religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state
>that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
>Since there is more than one of these religions, and since people do
not
>belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to
>Hell.
>
>With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of
>
>souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of
>change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order
>for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume
>of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
>
>This gives two possibilities:
>
>1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
>enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
>until all Hell breaks loose.
>
>2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
>Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
>over.
>
>
>So which is it?
>
>If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my freshman
year
>that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,
>and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then
>number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and
>has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since
Hell
>has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and
>is, therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the
>existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept
>shouting "Oh my God."...
>
>
>THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A
 

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