This man knows the truth! This has got to happen.
I can imagine it now in Turin.........
Nataly sitting by a table in the Caffe San Carlo. Beautiful and bubbly, but has no true sexual fullfillment in her life. Her and a couple of friends are sitting around, sipping on Negrino's and Cardinale's and such. Of course Mauricio and his boy, Esteban, are at the table with them, laughing, teasing and generally acting the fools. Mauricio and Esteban start to get flirtatious with the girls, and talk about Body Shots. The girls were just about game...............
................Entonces entra Carlos Primera
I whip out my Galaxy III with photo of Faustino Asprilla in "El Vestuario de Colombia", and discreetly hand it to Nataly under the table. The instant she looks at it, her eyes bulge as if she suffered from hyperthyroidism and she holds it close to her chest like the precious lost Diamond from the Titanic. Her mouth open wide enough to see her Salivary glands in overdrive. By this time, her friends Yeini and Claudia want to see, and say "¡QUEREMOS VER, QUEREMOS VER!" (We want to see! We want to see!)
By this point Mauricio and Esteban are unamused and are looking at me, as if I am trying to "cock-block" them.
Nataly shows my phone to Yeini and Claudia and there are squeals of delight, and sounds of amazement. It gets passed around, and for whatever reason, whichever "chica" gets it, she clutches it to her chest, as if it is a secret she cannot share with no other woman. Mauricio and Esteban finally get ahold of my phone and their faces betray their emotions as both turn pale, and have looks of disgust. Mauricio has the audacity to ask me "¿Hermano, porque tiene un retrato de un negro desnudo con un erecćion en su telefono? ¿Es tu un maricón?" (Bro, why do you have a photo of a naked black man with a massive erection on your phone? Are you gay?)
At which point, I smile wryly and tell Mauricio "Yo soy simplemente un peleador de la verdad" (I am simply a fighter for the truth). I then rattle off the names of a few "Black Bulls" who play for Juve: Boakye, Asamoah, Pogba, Ogbonna....... and ask the "chicas", if they know which bar they "hung" out at, no pun intended. Nataly, her eyes in a frenzy, fervously asks "¿Donde estan las fieras magnificas vagan?" (where do these magnificent beasts roam?)
I then tell them about Docks8 in Turin and that men descended from Mandingo's bloodline, such as Asprilla and Ogbonna, are there waiting for them to dance for them. They can hang out at Caffe San Carlo with Mauricio and Esteban and watch them drink Coronas, or they can take their dancing feet over to Docks8, and dance to hits like 50 Cents "In da Club". They all decide to go to docks8, leaving Mauricio and Esteban with nauseated looks on their faces.
I then re-take my seat at the barstool, wink at Mauricio and Esteban, raise my glass of Calvados and say "¡Salud!"
until you mentionned 50 cent in da club, took me right out, work on your pop culture references 
