English is a stupid language (1 Viewer)

Lilianna

Senior Member
Apr 3, 2003
15,969
#1
Lets face it.
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day
And as cold as hell on another

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this poem
It ends.

*no offence of caurse...i love english sooo sooo much but i found this in a site and like it ;) *
 

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OP
Lilianna

Lilianna

Senior Member
Apr 3, 2003
15,969
  • Thread Starter
  • Thread Starter #7
    ++ [ originally posted by Josh ] ++
    lili if i posted that you would be like "WTH are you talking about :groan: you are sooooooooooooo stupiddd !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    :p
    me...??

    omg..have i created the image of a b!tch so badly?? :p
     
    OP
    Lilianna

    Lilianna

    Senior Member
    Apr 3, 2003
    15,969
  • Thread Starter
  • Thread Starter #9
    a greek site...

    it has just too few english funny stuff,all the others are in greek.

    still interested??
     
    OP
    Lilianna

    Lilianna

    Senior Member
    Apr 3, 2003
    15,969
  • Thread Starter
  • Thread Starter #12
    ++ [ originally posted by Josh ] ++


    noooooooo!!!

    omg...i just like to type like you

    :D i wonder if u talk like that too :flirt:
    thanx god you actually like smg about me :p :LOL:

    well no...i don't talk like this :rofl:

    i think i talk normally. ;)
     

    Majed

    Senior Member
    Jul 17, 2002
    9,630
    #16
    ++ [ originally posted by Josh ] ++
    you dont say sooooooooooooooooooooo and noooooooooooooooooo with many !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!s and ???????????????????s when you talk?
    i thought Vinman is Mr.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and ????????????????????
     

    gray

    Senior Member
    Moderator
    Apr 22, 2003
    30,260
    #18
    Josh, I didn't know you had a thing for Asian girls ;)

    Indeed English is very inconsistent in its rules, and very hard for a newcomer to just pick up, since there's so many isolated cases where a word completely breaks all the rules of the language :irritate:
     

    Majed

    Senior Member
    Jul 17, 2002
    9,630
    #20
    ++ [ originally posted by Graham ] ++
    Josh, I didn't know you had a thing for Asian girls ;)

    Indeed English is very inconsistent in its rules, and very hard for a newcomer to just pick up, since there's so many isolated cases where a word completely breaks all the rules of the language :irritate:
    i actually think it's easy for new comers to pick up because there aren't many rules, but it's harder to perfect since there are exceptions.

    Unlike Chinese, Arabic where there are many rules making it hard to pick up at first.
     

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