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As Popeye would put it, it's "downright embarrasskin'" when you put it in those terms. Viva la English Mercenary League, brought to you by Barclay's -- when those other credit cards won't cover Fernando Torres' transfer fee.

There's a few players on Rooney's old Everton who are having stellar seasons compared to what we've got going on in midfield this year -- like Graveson.

EPL is only overrated in English-speaking countries. Otherwise, I would give my first born to have someone like Lampard play on Juve this season.