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@ djleli, making the olympics more interesting 1-13: Two thumbs way way up. I ain't laughed so hard in a dog's age. :rofl:

It is time to do a comparison between two things treasured by men, beer and *****... A beer is always wet. A ***** needs encouragement. Advantage: Beer. A beer tastes horrible served hot. A ***** tastes better served hot. Advantage: *****. Having an ice cold beer makes you...

A multimillionaire is dying and wants to "take it" with him. He then calls his three closest friends, a Doctor, a Priest and a Lawyer and says to them, "I'm leaving each of you 30 million dollars, but I want you to bury it with me." They each agree. At the funeral, the Priest steps up with a...

Here's another one form the inimitable Slappy White: A girl goes to this lawyer and says, "I was raped." The lawyer says, "You was raped, don't worry about it. I'll get you some money. Now, tell me all about it." Lady: "He grabbed me, and put me in his car." Lawyer: "He grabbed you and...

A man goes to work one day with a terrible pain in his arm. He asks his best friend for advice, and his friend tells him about a new drugstore on the corner with a machine that only needs a sample of your urine and it can tell what's wrong with you. And this for the bargain price of $5. The man...