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:lol: Menace, I hear there's a new Easy Bake Suicide Oven for kids. You should give it a try. It will take about 4 months of your head in there with a 60-Watt lightbulb, but hey -- it's worth a try. And no messy matches either.

Father: "Soccer? Don't all the matches end 0-0?" Mother: "What's that team you like again, Greg?" Brother 1: "How many players are there on a team?" Brother 2: "I was a goalie in high school once, but now I'm just a ninja. Can't name a single pro team, though."